Personalities in Disorder
by winterhorses
Summary: O/S for our dear Meli Stories. Emmett is sure that his smooth-talking friend, Edward, will be able to crack the thick ice of Bella the man-hater. Alice doesn't agree, and a wager is made. But both are surprised when neither Bella nor Edward act as expected.
1. Chapter 1

**This is something I wrote a little while ago for dear, brave Meli Stories and the "Words for Meli" compilation. I hope you enjoy this short bit of light-heartedness!**

* * *

"It's all Jacob Black's fault! I could just _strangle_ him!" Alice Brandon seethed, her dark eyes flashing.

Jasper Hale raised an eyebrow. "Alrighty then. And this Jacob Black would be…who?"

"Bella's first boyfriend in high school. He cheated on her when she wouldn't put out for him."

"Ouch. That sucks. And it certainly makes him an asshole, but what does he have to do with anything?"

"Mike Newton didn't help either," Alice continued without replying, caught up in her rant. "I should've twisted his balls off when I had the chance!"

"Mike Newton?"

"The possessive, controlling slug she dated her freshman year in college. He hated when she spent time with any of her friends and had to know what she was doing every minute of every day."

"Okay, so there's Jacob and Mike—"

"Oh my God, Paul! Ugh, how could I forget _Paul_? I think he was the nail in the coffin. The rat bastard. GQ on the surface, drug-dealing con man on the sly. We never suspected a thing until he disappeared one day...along with Bella's wallet and all of her jewelry." Alice pounded her fists on the restaurant table in unadulterated anger.

Jasper reached across the wood and gently grasped her hands. "Whoa, there, Karate Kid. Let's leave the place in one piece."

Alice sighed. "I know, I know, it's just…Bella's a sweet girl and doesn't deserve to have such a terrible history with guys. It kills me to see how introverted and closed off she's become."

"Bella was your college roommate, right? The one who just moved back to Seattle?"

Alice nodded. "Yeah. She went to live near her mom in Florida while getting her Master's but wasn't a fan of the heat and humidity. She's been here for about a month now. God, I feel like such a bad friend because I've hardly seen her at all. You know how many hours Rose and I have been putting in."

"I'm half-afraid to ask, but what brought on the sudden tirade?"

"Well, now that wedding season is winding down, I have time to catch up with her." A deep scowl formed on Alice's delicate features. "I was talking to her earlier today, trying to set up a casual get-together with some friends—Rose, maybe Rose's new guy if he's cool, you, Angela…" Alice trailed off, the furrows on her brow deepening.

"And?" Jasper prompted after a long silence.

"And...I _might_ have given her a teeny tiny bit of grief about her lack of dating over the past three years." She hesitated as if to say something else but then pressed her lips tightly together.

Jasper gave her a skeptical, probing look. " _And_ …?"

" _And..._ I told her I knew a bunch of nice guys and tried to set her up on some dates!" Alice huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "I was just trying to be helpful! She didn't need to get so pissy about it. And she _definitely_ didn't need to call me an 'interfering nag' and then hang up on me!"

It wasn't easy, but Jasper somehow managed to keep a straight face instead of chuckling like he wanted to. "Um, is there any possibility you might have been pressing her just a little too hard? I haven't known you for that long, Ali dear, but you can be very, uh, insistent at times." He offered her a tender smile to soften his words.

"I _suppose_ it's a possibility," Alice conceded with a guilty pout. "But I only have her happiness in mind. I know Bella. She's a romantic at heart who's always dreamed of having a cute little picket fence family with two-and-a-half Golden Retrievers or whatever. That'll never happen the way things are going now. So what if she struck out three times? That doesn't mean she should stop playing ball forever!"

"Who stopped playing with balls?"

Jasper and Alice turned in their seats at the sound of the amused voice behind them.

"Hey, Rose," Alice greeted absently, her eyes immediately going to the muscular man accompanying her friend. "And _you're_ obviously Emmett. It's great to finally meet you!"

"Same here," he replied with an easy smile.

"Em, this is my brother, Jasper," Rosalie said, taking a seat at the table.

While the two men shook hands and exchanged greetings, Rosalie turned to Alice, curiosity on her face.

"So what's the deal with your reluctant athlete?"

Alice snorted. "I wouldn't exactly call Bella an athlete."

"Oh lord," Rosalie groaned, rolling her eyes. "Are you going on about her man-hate again? Give the girl a rest. If she wants to be a nun, that's her business."

"But she doesn't want that! I know she doesn't."

"Really? Do you not remember how she acted the last time we visited her? It was nearly impossible to get her out of the house, and when we finally did manage to drag her to a club, she sat in the booth and sulked the whole time. The few guys stupid enough to ignore her death glare all crashed and burned in less than a minute. Face it, Ali, the massive chip on her shoulder isn't going anywhere anytime soon. No man alive's got a chance of getting into her iron-clad panties."

Emmett let out a snort and smirked. "Oh, I know someone who could. He'd melt them right off, guaranteed. This guy's, like, the Chick Whisperer or something."

"Yeah?" Alice asked, her eyes alight with interest. But her expression quickly dimmed. "No, Rose is right. Bella would shoot down that playboy long before he got within panty-melting range."

"Hey, Edward's not a playboy!" Emmett protested. "Yeah, he's smooth, alright, but there's not an ounce of sketchiness in him. He's respectful and loyal. I'd trust him with my kid sister—if I had one."

"Well, since this guy's so great, I'm guessing he's taken, right?" Rose asked archly, examining her manicured fingernails.

Emmett shrugged. "He's had one or two sorta-girlfriends over the years I've known him, but I don't think he's been very serious with any of them. Med school and residency ate a lot of his time, and honestly, I don't see him ever settling down. He's all but married to his work."

"What kind of doctor is he?" Jasper asked.

"Edward just started his specialty residency," Emmett replied proudly. "Pediatric surgery."

"Sounds like you have a man-crush on him, babe," Rosalie pointed out with a smirk.

"Nah. It's true he's got the job, money, looks, and charm, but I'm a family guy through and through." He grinned at Rosalie. "I picture myself as one of those dads wearing a kid in a camo-colored baby carrier while pushing another one in a stroller. That's what I want someday."

Both Jasper and Alice were shocked when an uncharacteristic blush spread across the blonde's cheeks.

Alice recovered first. "Well," she said quickly, knowing Rosalie would appreciate a subject change, "the last thing I think Bella should do is jump into a relationship after so long. I just want her to loosen up around men—talk, maybe flirt a little, or even some good ol' fashioned grinding on the dance floor. But the girl's so far gone, I'll bet even your Wonder Boy couldn't crack her ice."

"I'll take that bet," Emmett declared with confidence. "I have yet to meet a straight woman or gay man who wasn't drawn to him in some way. You'll see what I mean."

"I think I'll have to after that build-up," Alice said. "So what do I get when I win?"

"Ha, there's no chance you'd win. But I'll play along. If the impossible happened, what would you want?"

Alice pursed her lips in thought. "Actually, I'd rather lose the bet for Bella's sake, but since I know _you're_ the one who doesn't have a chance…I got it! Rosalie mentioned you have a Porsche. You do, right?"

"Yeah," Emmett replied warily. "A 2011 Carrera GTS. Why?"

"I want to drive it. For a whole weekend."

Rosalie snickered at Emmett's pained expression as he considered her terms.

"Alright, fine," he muttered. "But you have to promise this Bella-chick isn't a closet lesbian or anything. Edward's good, but even his magic has a limit."

"Oh, I'm gonna have so much fun with that car!" Alice squealed. "What do you want in the highly unlikely event that you win?"

" _When_ I win…huh, what else do I need other than bragging rights?" He turned to Rosalie. "Babe, you want me to make Ali-cat your slave for a day or something?"

"Nuh uh, keep me out of it," she said, shaking her blonde head in disdain. "In fact, I'd like to see both of you lose. This has disaster written all over it."

"Yeah, like, what if Bella actually ends up liking this guy, but he's not interested?" Jasper asked. "That'd be pretty harsh."

"I'm telling you, it's not gonna happen," Alice said. "And I'm so sure that I'll clean Emmett's entire apartment to 'Alice standards' if she even gives him the time of day."

"I'll take it!" Emmett exclaimed. "Rose told me how anal and germophobic you are. My place could use a good deep cleaning."

"But Babe—" Rosalie began, scowling.

She was interrupted when the waiter came to take their orders. Emmett could see that Rosalie was getting more worked up during the delay and jumped in to speak the moment the waiter turned away.

"We're just having a little fun. I promise Bella won't get hurt," he soothed. "I'm telling you, Edward's one of those guys who could show up to repo your house, and you'd still end up thanking him for it somehow. The worst that could happen is Bella getting a fun evening out of the deal and a new friend. With you 'n me being together, they're bound to meet at some point anyway. Alice and I are simply observing their behavior and predicting the outcome. Think of it as silent data collection. We won't interfere with the natural course of things."

Rosalie eyed her boyfriend and best friend in turn, only slightly mollified. "No interfering, huh? You'd better the hell not. I'll be watching you two."

Alice and Emmett quickly agreed that a night out for the six of them would be arranged when a suitable time could be found. Still irritated by the whole idea, Rosalie turned the conversation to the success of the event planning business she and Alice owned. There was no more discussion concerning either Bella or Edward for the rest of the meal.

Alice, however, couldn't get her mind off the wager. She had a strange feeling that it was important; that there was more on line than just winning a silly little bet. And even though her fingers itched to wrap themselves around the wheel of Emmett's Porsche, she'd be more than happy to lose if that meant Bella benefitted in some way.

And so, the very next day, Alice sweet-talked Rosalie into manning the office by herself and showed up at Bella Swan's apartment door.

It took the brunette several minutes to let her in, and when she did, she was not in the best of moods.

"For God's sake, Alice, it's eight in the morning!" she groaned, lurching to her couch and falling flat onto it. "You know I don't wake up early unless I absolutely have to. And right now, I'm on vacation. This is practically a crime."

"You're such a crybaby," Alice teased. "Doesn't school start up again in a few weeks? You need to get your body used to a different schedule, or you'll be in a world of hurt that first week."

"I'm working on it," Bella grumped, her face buried in a decorative pillow. "But I think I'm still on Florida time. I can't seem to fall asleep until late."

"Well, maybe if you got up early every morning, you'd be tired enough at night."

Bella struggled to lift her hand so she could flip Alice off. "Did you come here just to lecture me on my sleep habits, or is there another reason for your disgustingly cheerful presence at this ungodly hour?"

Alice plopped down on the couch on top of Bella's outstretched legs and swatted her rear end. "Well, other than to wonder why these holey sweatpants are on your body instead of in the rag bin, I want to find out your schedule so we can meet up for a night out with Rose."

Bella raised her head to gape at Alice. "And you had to drive halfway across the city to ask me this in person instead of—oh, I dunno—sending me a text or email, or even calling on the phone?"

"Like I would've had much luck with that," Alice scoffed. "You know as well as I do that _if_ you checked your messages and ever got back to me, it'd be weeks from now. You have the worst record when it comes replying. The only way I can guarantee a response is to track you down and force it out of you."

"I guess you might have a point there," Bella conceded with a scowl, letting her head fall back onto the pillow. "But seriously, eight in the friggin' morning?"

"I'm impatient to get this set up and couldn't wait any longer. Be grateful it wasn't six. So, are you free this weekend and/or next? Both Saturdays are looking good right now, but I haven't confirmed with everyone yet."

In a quick move that caught Alice by surprise, Bella flipped over and pushed herself into a sitting position on the couch. "Wait a sec. What exactly do you mean by ' _everyone'_? I thought it was just Rose and you. It better be. Because if you're even _thinking_ of inviting a bunch of single, horny male gorillas along to hit on me all night…"

"Of course not!" her friend replied breezily, waving her hand in the air. After all, she was only inviting one, not a bunch. "You've made it more than clear that you're done with romantic relationships, and I've finally accepted that."

 _In fact, I'm counting on it_ , she thought to herself as images of the 408-horsepower prize flashed through her mind.

"Thank goodness," Bella sighed in relief.

Yet Alice swore she could hear faint notes of longing and regret in her friend's tone.

 _Interesting. Emmett's chances might be better than I thought…_

"But when I said 'everyone,' I _was_ planning on more than just the three of us," she said aloud, carefully choosing her words to keep from lying outright. "Rose and I have fallen hard for our guys, and we really want you to meet them. Both Jasper and Emmett are looking forward to it. They know how important you are to us."

Bella's expression softened. "Of course we should all get together. I want to meet them, too. In fact, why don't you come over for dinner? I haven't had a chance to cook for anyone besides myself since I got here."

"Actually, I was thinking we could go out in town," Alice said hastily. It was one thing for Emmett's friend to tag along to a bar or restaurant, but having him show up unannounced at Bella's door was going a little far over the social rudeness line, even for Alice. "That way, you can relax and not worry about having to put a meal together—"

"Relax? Please. You know how much I hate the whole process of getting dressed up and going out. If anything, it's cooking that chills me out, and playing hostess will force me to interact—which should make you happy. It's the perfect solution for everyone. I don't have anything going on in the evenings yet, so just let me know the day and time."

"Uhh, okay, great, I'll let you know," Alice muttered, her mind racing. It seemed as if she'd be crossing into rudeness territory, after all.

At least it was for a good cause.

* * *

Emmett was met with much less resistance when he proposed the idea to Edward.

"You're going to dinner with me and Rose this weekend," he declared, upping the speed on his treadmill.

Beside him, Edward increased his speed, too. "Rose is the girl you're seeing, right? That'd be fine, except I'm on shift pretty much the whole time. Next weekend is okay, though."

"Cool, I'll let Alice know."

"Who's Alice?"

"Rose's business partner and best friend. She's also dating Rose's brother, Jasper. Oh, and it looks like we'll be doing dinner at Bella's place. She's Rose's other best friend." Emmett glanced at Edward's display and frowned. He bumped up his speed again.

Edward let out a breathy chuckle. "What, you need me as backup to meet the brother and the besties? You must have it bad for this girl."

"Yep," Emmett said proudly. "She's The One. I'm gonna marry her and make lots of cute babies. Probably need to get a bigger condo, though, or maybe a house in the 'burbs."

"Damn, Em, didn't you just meet her, like, a few weeks ago?" Edward pushed a button until treadmill was moving slightly faster than his friend's. "You're already planning your life together?"

"When you know, you know. And I _know_." Emmett grabbed a handful of his shirt to wipe his sweaty brow. "What about you? You ever plan on settling down?"

"Eh, I'm not totally against it, but it's not something I'm looking for. My life's busy enough as it is without trying to fit in a relationship and kids and all that drama."

"I never understood that about you. After growing up with your ridiculously perfect family, you don't want that, too?"

"I dunno, maybe I'm worried that no relationship could match the one my parents have. You know how I hate to fail at anything. And, for theirs to work so well, they both had to make sacrifices in their personal and professional lives. I'm way too spoiled to do that. I'm going to be at the top of my field and don't want to worry about a wife and kids slowing me down." As if to emphasize the point, his finger mashed the up arrow on his treadmill until the belt was flying under his feet.

"Dammit, E, why you gotta be so effin' competitive!" Emmett huffed as he tried to keep pace but failed.

Edward's laugh was labored, but he continued to sprint full-out until the machine beeped and slowed automatically.

The two men jogged lightly for a little while longer, catching their breath and cooling down.

When they finally stepped off the equipment, Edward mopped his face with his towel and then threw it at Emmett. "You know, maybe if you got in a few extra workouts instead of hanging out all day with your girl, you might be able to beat me."

Emmett tossed the towel back and grinned good-naturedly. "Maybe. But when it comes to spending time with Rosie versus doing something else, well, there's no competition."

* * *

Other than the minor hiccup of Bella's insistence to host, the get-together was easily arranged. Alice had nothing else to do except count down the days, which annoyed her to no end.

It also annoyed Rosalie.

She had no idea how she was going to survive two weeks of Alice's excited chatter and was very tempted to work from home until after the dinner. A pair of noise cancelling headphones, suggested by Jasper, was the only reason she kept her sanity.

The ear-saving devices proved even more invaluable when Bella suddenly changed her mind about having everyone over to her apartment, suggesting they meet up at a bar, instead. Despite insistent questioning, Alice wasn't able to coax a reason for the venue change and spent the three days prior trying (aloud) to figure it out.

"Did I finally get through to her about shutting herself away from the world?" she mused, pacing in front of her office desk. "Or is she just hoping to get me off her back for a while? What if this is some sort of ploy so she can fake an emergency at the last minute and ditch us? Or maybe she's—"

"Girl, Imma strangle you if you don't shut your hole and get back to work," Rosalie growled. "I swear, if you weren't my partner, I'd fire your ass."

"I know! I should offer to help her get ready!" Alice exclaimed, ignoring Rosalie completely. "That way, I can make sure she shows up—and _not_ in her favorite old-jeans-and-faded-tee combo."

A pen went sailing through the air and plunked Alice in the center of her chest. She let out an indignant yelp and fixed a dark-eyed glare at her friend.

"If you'll drop the subject and call the damn caterer for the Thompson party now, I'll stop by Bella's and bring her myself, okay?" Rosalie offered in exasperation. "It makes a lot more sense than you harassing her, especially seeing as how her place is on my way to the bar."

Alice pouted. "I _guess_ that's okay. But don't you dare let her wear Doc Martens or anything like that! I promised Emmett she wasn't a lesbian."

Rosalie gritted her teeth and told herself she'd look terrible in prison orange.

* * *

Jasper took a sip of his beer and smiled fondly at Alice as she squirmed in her seat. He loved her passion and excitement, which was so opposite his calm, laid-back personality. His life had been rather dull until she came whirling in like a multicolored tornado.

"According to his text, Emmett should be here any minute with Edward," Alice chattered, fiddling with straw in her drink. "I don't know where Rose is. She's being a bitchy witch and won't tell me anything. Grr. I wouldn't be surprised if there's some sort of wardrobe emergency, given Bella's sad lack of decent clothes. I knew I should've gone over there, darnit. I should've gone there and made sure that—oh, _shit_ …"

"What is it, sugar?" Jasper was perplexed about Alice's suddenly astonished expression. He followed the stare of her almost-comically wide eyes and saw a pair of men making their way across the room.

"Emmett said his friend was good-looking, but _that_ guy is a friggin' walking wet dream!" she hissed. "It's hardly a fair fight; poor Bella won't stand a chance. Oh lordy, I've made a huge mistake. He's gonna play her like a fiddle and leave her in worse shape than ever—I just know it! I'm forfeiting right this second. There's no way I'm letting this happen!"

She watched warily as Emmett strutted up to their table and settled his large frame in a chair. His bronze-haired friend flashed a charming smile and took a seat beside him.

"You must be Alice and Jasper. It's great to meet you," Edward said, his voice warm, inviting. His green eyes glittered and danced as if they knew the deepest secrets of the universe.

Jasper shook his hand while Alice blinked a few times as if to free herself from his alluring spell. She tilted her chin and regarded him more carefully.

"You look familiar. I feel like I've seen you somewhere before," she said in a somewhat accusatory tone.

Emmett laughed and slapped Edward on the back. "You'd probably recognize him if he was wearing less clothes. Famous male underwear model, right here."

"Hardly," the other man snorted, shaking his head. "I did a shoot for Ralph Lauren when I was in college. It was a one-time deal, and I needed the money." He rolled his eyes at his friend. "I really wish you'd forget that ever happened."

Emmett just smirked.

Alice looked back and forth between the two of them, her eyes narrowed in indignation. "Aw, hells no!" she fumed. "A doctor _and_ an underwear model? What else—do you put on a batsuit and fight crime at night?" She wagged a finger at him. "No, no, no. You're bad news, and I forbid you talk to Bella. Don't even look at her."

"Bella?" Edward asked, furrowing his brow. "Ah, right. Rose's other best friend. Emmett mentioned you all went to UW together."

"Yep. Bella was my roommate, and Rose and I met in a study group. The three of us started hanging out, and the rest is history."

"Well, from what I've heard, some of that history was rather...scandalous," Edward replied with a grin. "A story about a certain streaking incident comes to mind..."

"I will neither confirm nor deny the events of that epically drunken night," Alice sniffed. "But I will say this: I've got my girls' backs—naked or otherwise. You and your tight little underwear-modeling tushie had better behave yourselves, especially around Bella."

Edward chuckled good-naturedly. "Of course. I pride myself on being a gentleman above all else."

"Uh huh. I'm sure you do," Alice muttered, unimpressed. "Listen, about Bella...I don't know if you've heard anything from Emmett, but I should tell you that—"

"Whoa, who is _she_?"

Annoyed at the interruption, Alice glared at Edward before turning to see what he was staring at. Then she gasped and stared, too.

"That's Bella?" Emmett asked, his voice higher than usual. "What the hell, Alice? You made it sound like…but she's the opposite of…damn! What are you playing at here?"

Jasper was also surprised. Given everything Alice had told him, he half-expected Bella to show up dressed like some sort of mousy homeless person in a flannel shirt, ripped jeans, and scuffed sneakers.

The confident woman gliding toward their table looked anything but.

She wore a tight, mid-thigh length black dress that flaunted every one of her hourglass curves and silvery peep-toe stilettos. Her hair cascaded in voluminous mahogany waves over her shoulders and down her back. Plump lips were painted an inviting dark red color, and her sparkling eyes were framed by long, thick lashes. Yet despite her sensual appearance and poised demeanor, she somehow projected an air of angelic innocence.

Edward gawked, unabashed, as if in a trance.

"Emmett, do you believe in love at first sight? 'Cuz I think I do," Edward murmured dreamily. His eyes were half-lidded, and one corner of his mouth turned up in a strange sort of curl. "I understand what you were saying now. It's so weird, but suddenly, I can see it all. The wedding, the house, the kids…everything."

Emmett blinked at him for a few moments before bursting into laughter. "Ha! Nice one, Eddie. You had me going there for a second. I actually thought you were serious."

"Oh, I'm serious, alright," Edward breathed, still absorbed in Bella's every move. "I've never been more serious about anything in my life."

"Yeah, whatever." Emmett frowned at his friend's uncharacteristic behavior. "I'm not sure why you're acting so weird, but it's really not that funny. Quit messing around."

Alice heard none of the exchange between Emmett and Edward. She was too busy trying to shove her eyes back into her head. The moment she regained some semblance of sense, she launched out of her chair and hurried to her two friends.

"Holy crap, Bella, you look un-freaking-believable!"she exclaimed. "I've never seen you this hot before! How did this happen?" She grabbed Rosalie's wrist. "I need to know how you did this! Drugs? Blackmail? Threat of bodily harm? You have to tell me your secret!"

Bella smiled and let out a low, throaty chuckle. She removed Alice's hand from Rosalie and squeezed it in her own. "It's not a secret, Ali. I just finally realized you were right. I need to get over my past issues and enjoy life again—come out of my shell. So, here I am, ready to live it up!" She glanced around the room and wrinkled her nose. "Huh, this place is kinda small, but I guess it'll do. Let's have a few drinks and then hit the dance floor. I feel like shakin' my ass tonight!"

Stunned, Alice looked at Rosalie, who just shrugged and resumed walking to the table. Introductions were already underway by the time Alice broke out of her daze and joined them.

"…is Edward, a good friend of Emmett's. They lived in the same neighborhood when they were kids and went to school together."

To Alice's continued amazement, Bella gave Edward a seductive grin and daintily offered her hand. He grabbed onto it like someone had thrown him a lifeline and placed a reverent kiss on her knuckles.

"You are a magnificent goddess," he sighed, longing heavy in his voice.

Bella giggled and withdrew her hand. "Why, thank you, kind sir. Maybe you'll get a demonstration of my powers later on."

Edward's face lit up like the sun, while Alice and Emmett exchanged a rather panicked glance.

Initially, Alice had planned the seating so that Bella would be next to Edward. But she hastily plunked herself down in that chair, leaving the one between Jasper and Rosalie open. She had no idea what was going on with her friend and wanted her as far away from Dr. McHot Buns as possible.

Emmett was just as confused about Edward's behavior. In all the years they'd know each other, he'd never seen Edward so completely taken with a woman. Instead of a smooth, irresistible charmer, the man had become an awkward, starry-eyed schoolboy. His fawning attempts to get in Bella's good graces were downright embarrassing. And on top of that, they seemed to have the opposite effect desired.

The more attention Edward lavished on Bella as the night wore on, the less interested she appeared. And as if to rub his face in it, she began flirting with nearly every other male in the establishment, including Jasper and Emmett. Alice wanted to hide under the table when Bella began stroking the chest of a very uncomfortable Emmett. Even more to her surprise, the usually possessive Rosalie either didn't notice or didn't care.

When Alice couldn't stand it anymore, she grabbed Bella's arm and dragged her to the bathroom.

"What the hell has gotten into you tonight?" she demanded to know as soon as the door swung shut behind them.

Bella smoothed down her hair in the mirror and smirked. "Nothing yet, but I don't plan on letting it stay that way."

Alice almost choked on her gasp. "Ack, stop acting like this! It's freaking me out. And I'm serious—I need to know what's going on with this sudden turn-around. Like, on a scale of one to 'immediate intervention,' how worried should I be?"

"Honestly, Ali, you need to calm down. I told you, I'm just lightening up a little—giving the game another try. Besides, _you're_ the one who kept riding my ass about this. I figured you'd be the first one in line cheering me on."

"Well, yeah, it's just…I figured that if you ever did listen to me, it would be about something small, like—I dunno—putting on a nice shirt and a smile. I never expected a complete one-eighty like this!"

"Anything worth doing is worth doing right—don't you agree?" Bella fluttered her eyelashes coquettishly at her friend.

"I guess," Alice replied, studying Bella's flippant expression. "I'm curious, though. Why the cold shoulder when it comes to Edward? I mean, uh, not that I think you _should_ pay any special attention to him…or even regular attention…I mean, guys that pretty are bound to be players and heart-breakers and…" She trailed off, completely mixed up over whether she should be hoping for the two of them to get along or not.

Bella laughed breezily. "Yeah, he's hot, I'll give you that, but don't you think he's a little too dorky and awkward? Besides, he seems like such a _relationship_ kind of guy. Thanks, but no thanks. I've had enough of that crap for a long time. I just wanna have fun—like you said!"

She gave her hair one final pat and skipped out of the bathroom as Alice stared blankly after her.

* * *

Back at the table, Edward was in the middle of his own interrogation session.

"I don't get it. What's so special about _this_ girl that all of the sudden you're ready to pick out china patterns?" Emmett asked in an urgent whisper. "You hardly know anything about her!"

"I know enough," Edward replied stubbornly, his eyes trained on the hallway where Bella had disappeared. "What's it to you, anyway? Just last week you were going on and on about the wonders of commitment and giving into your feelings and all that shit. Now you're telling me to slow down? Talk about a mixed message."

"Yeah, but…look, man, there's something you should know about this girl. From what I've heard, she's been through a couple of rough relationships, so I don't think she's looking for anything too, uh, serious right now. And...I hate to point out the obvious, but, um, she sorta doesn't seem that into you…"

"She'll come around," Edward said, unconcerned. "It may take some time, but she'll eventually see what I see: that we're made for each other."

"Uhh, I'm not sure it works like that." Emmett frowned, his face etched with worry. "Look, I know getting smacked down might be a new thing for you, but you gotta ease up—both for her sake, and yours. Otherwise, you're gonna be really hurt when things don't work out. Or served a restraining order for being a creepy stalker, which, by the way, doesn't seem that that far from the truth right now."

"Don't be ridiculous," Edward chastised dismissively. "Everything will be f— _oh_! She's coming back! God, look at her, Em. Have you ever seen anything so gorgeous?"

Emmett wisely did not comment. There was no denying Bella's beauty, but in his mind, no one could hold a candle to his Rosalie. Besides, he honestly cared about Edward and didn't like how Bella was treating his friend—even if the man _was_ making a fool of himself. Scowling, Emmett watched as Bella let her fingertips slide across the back a particularly well-muscled guy sitting at the bar. The object of her attention turned on his bar stool and smirked suggestively as she walked past.

Edward's narrowed eyes also caught the interaction. His hands clenched in determination, and he grunted lowly, somewhat like a possessive caveman. But the dark expression cleared the moment Bella sat down.

"Do you need anything, Bella?" he asked, eager to serve. "I see your drink's a little low. You want me to get you another?"

Bella rolled her eyes and sighed. "Sure, whatever."

Edward was out of his seat and hurrying to the bar before she finished speaking.

Emmett groaned in dismay, prompting a sardonic chuckle from Rosalie. Bella heard it and looked askance at them.

"What's going on?"

"Uh, nothing. Nothing at all," Emmett said, the words coming out in a rush. He shifted uncomfortably and then stood up. "Actually, I just remembered that I need to talk to Alice about…uh, a personal issue. Yeah, a personal issue that happens to be, um…personal. So I'm just gonna borrow her for a quick second, and then we'll be right back."

Alice had no idea what Emmett was up to, but she was happy for the chance to get him alone. She wanted to concede the bet, drag Bella home before the girl did anything she later regretted, and grill her 'til she spilled.

But Emmett was quicker on the draw.

"I'm sorry, Ali. I don't know what the hell's going on with Edward, but I think it's clear that you win. Bella is totally schooling him on the meaning of rejection."

For a second, Alice considered shutting her mouth and basking in glow of victory. But she knew there were more important issues at stake.

"No, that wouldn't be fair," she said. "Bella was definitely flirting and receptive when they first met. I would've given you the win for a lot less than that. I think the best thing to do in this case is call it a draw and worry about what's going on with our friends, instead."

Emmett nodded and sighed. "Yeah. And really, when you think about it, we both got we wanted—sort of. Edward says he's ready for a relationship, and Bella's playing the field. They just went from zero to sixty _reeeally_ fast, that's all."

"Scary fast, if you ask me," Alice replied. "Anyway, I'm thinking of calling it a night. I can't handle much more of her weirdness."

"Sounds good. Are you taking Bella with you? 'Cause I'm pretty sure Edward's not going anywhere until she does, and I hate to leave his pathetic ass here alone. He'd probably drown in a puddle of his own drool or something."

Alice chuckled wryly. "The boy's got it bad, alright. It's a shame she doesn't like him; they'd be a cute couple."

The co-conspirators returned to their table, where Bella was making eyes at a guy across the room. Edward watched them in obvious jealously. Alice tried to convince her to leave, but the brunette adamantly refused. Though she'd only had a few drinks, they seemed to be having a strong effect, and Bella wanted to make the most of it.

There was a small dance floor in the corner of the bar, and she happily squeezed herself in the midst of the crowd to shake her thang. Alice and Rosalie looked on in amazement. Because they'd never seen her dance before, they just assumed she couldn't.

They were wrong.

"Girl's been holding out on us," Rosalie declared, mischief in her eyes.

She pulled Emmett out onto the floor. Edward and Alice followed, hot on their heels. Jasper did everyone a favor and sat out. The only kind of dancing he could do required cowboy boots.

Poor Edward tried and tried to get close to Bella, but she expertly slipped away each time. Meanwhile, he ignored the small legion of women who vied amongst themselves for his attention; his vigilant gaze never strayed from Bella's smooth movements and supple figure.

Though it seemed like forever to Alice and Emmett, Bella began to crash after an hour of heavy dancing. She teetered unsteadily on her heels and clung onto Emmett's arm to stay upright. Eventually, Rosalie was able to coax her off the dance floor and out of the bar.

The group stood on the sidewalk and discussed transportation arrangements. Rosalie and Emmett would take Bella home and see to it that she got into bed. Alice grudgingly accepted the fact that any type of interrogation would have to wait until later. Bella's eyes were shut, and Emmett was all but carrying her to Rosalie's car.

Edward, of course, pleaded to go with Bella but was met with a round of emphatic vetoes on that idea. He gave her a forlorn yet resolute goodbye and watched sadly as Rosalie pulled out of the parking lot.

Back at Bella's apartment, Emmett moved her from the vehicle, and Rosalie helped her get ready for bed. Bella blinked sleepily at her friend as she pulled up the covers.

"Nice job tonight, though you might have gone a little overboard on the alcohol," Rosalie chuckled softly.

"Oh, shhhut up, you wench," Bella mumbled, her words tripping over one another. "It's been a while since I had more than one drink in a night." She yawned and snuggled under the bedspread. "Thanks for helping out. You're a rockstar. I'll see ya tomorrow, 'kay?"

Rose agreed on both counts and wished her sweet dreams, but Bella didn't hear the sentiment. She was already out like a light.

* * *

An insistent knocking on her door woke her an hour later. Half-conscious and bleary-eyed, she wanted to ignore the annoying sound, but her feet placed themselves on the floor and walked across her apartment, seemingly of their own accord.

If she'd checked the peephole before opening the door, her actions might have been a little different. But she didn't and thus was completely unprepared for the force that swept her up and pushed her back against the wall. The tiny gasp she made upon impact was quickly swallowed by a pair of demanding lips.

Though her brain tried to catch up with what was happening, her body had a mind of its own. Her leg hitched itself over the hip in front of her, and she moaned, opening her mouth to the insistent thrusts of a warm, wet tongue.

Low-spoken words registered in her consciousness, though they were filtered through the haze of visceral lust that surrounded her.

"…so damned beautiful…tease all night long…hard to stay away…what you deserve…"

Eager hands travelled her body: her neck, her breasts, her waist, her hips. She felt long fingers cup her ass and shift her up the wall until she felt the pressure of a rock-hard erection settle between her legs.

"Oh, _fuck_ ," she breathed, grinding her hips over the large bulge. Her head tilted back, breaking their kiss but exposing her neck to delicious licking and sucking and biting.

"Yes. Fuck," came the reply. "That's what I want to do to you. I want to fuck you hard and senseless."

She shivered at the sound of his low, raspy voice. He had already achieved the senseless part of his plan; Bella could barely string two thoughts together.

But then, she only had one in mind, anyway.

"Bedroom," she croaked, digging her nails into his back.

"Your wish is my command," he murmured against her throat. "Though I really shouldn't be so nice. You weren't at all nice to me tonight, were you?"

"No, not at all," she gasped as threw her down on her bed and began pulling off her clothes. "I was t-terrible."

"Mm-hmm. Do you have any idea how crazy I was seeing you dance with those other men? You did that on purpose to make me jealous, didn't you?"

The moment her underwear was free of her legs, he dove in between them, tongue stroking, lips sucking. Bella's spine arched off bed from the intense pleasure.

"Fuck! Yes! I did it…on purpose…I had to…"

"Oh, really?" he hummed around the swollen clit that was throbbing in his mouth. "You just _had_ to let them put their hands on you and press against your body and breathe in your ear? Are you saying that you didn't enjoy it?"

"No! I didn't…oh God…yes! Just like that…please…don't stop…" Bella could barely stand the building ache and pushed herself down further onto the teasing tongue.

When all movement suddenly ceased, she cried out in desperation. He chuckled.

"Well, beautiful Bella, maybe I _have_ to stop right now. Maybe I _enjoy_ seeing you lying naked in front of me, panting and writhing and wanting more. Maybe this will help you understand how I felt tonight."

"I'm sorry! Please…" She was almost in tears. "Please don't stop..."

His arms were around her in a flash. "Oh baby, I'm sorry. I was just playing around. I'd never leave you wanting—you have to know that."

"Then take me now," she pleaded. "I need you inside me; I can't wait a second longer. Please...I need your hard, thick cock pounding into me…"

"Yes," he hissed, ripping off his own clothes as fast as he could. His eyes widened in hunger when her hands slipped between her legs, spreading herself open and furiously rubbing her clit.

They both cried out when he shoved himself hard inside her. Bella wasted no time flinging her arms and legs around him, holding on as tightly as she could to keep from being heaved off the bed from the force of his punishing thrusts.

"More," she begged as she clawed up and down his back, trying to find an outlet for the excess of pressure building inside her. "Harder. Fuck me harder."

When her teeth latched onto his shoulder, he growled and clenched his hand around her breast. The heady smell of their lust, the sound of skin slapping against skin, the taste of salty sweat—it combined and swirled and overwhelmed their senses until the unbearable ache burst into a crashing cascade of relief.

Bella gasped as her entire body tightened in wave after wave of pure pleasure that left her tingling and breathless. She felt him jerk and pulse inside her, filling her up with all that he had, with everything she'd so desperately needed.

It was the explosive ending to a long, torturous night for both of them.

"Oh my god," she sighed when he finally collapsed in an exhausted heap on top of her. "That was _so_ good."

"Mm, yes it was." His words were muffled against the mattress. "Let's do it again."

"Right now? Really?"

"Well, maybe not right this second. I'll give you a few minutes to recover."

She laughed and shoved on his chest until he rolled off her. " _I_ need a few minutes?" She grabbed a handful of tissues from her nightstand and began cleaning his softening penis. "I'm good for multiple orgasms. Mr. Floppy here, on the other hand, seems to be out for the count."

"Gee, kick a guy when he's down, why don't you?" he groused playfully as he turned on his side to look at her. He stared into her deep brown eyes and then gave her a smile full of adoration. "Hey, guess what?"

"What?"

"I love you, Bella Swan."

Even in the dimness, he could tell she was blushing. But there was no hesitation in her answer.

"I love you, too, Edward Cullen."

She lifted her head to meet him in a tender, sweet kiss that expressed their feelings for each other much better than mere words could.

Sighing happily, she coaxed him onto his back and situated herself in the crook of his arm. "So tonight went pretty well," she noted. "Alice and Emmett were so confused! That was fun to watch."

"Hmph. Hell of a lot better than having to see you get your flirt on," Edward grumbled.

"Oh, stop," Bella chided, tapping him on the chest. "It was all part of the plan. You know it didn't mean anything."

Edward grabbed her hips and pulled her on top of him. "Oh, I know that, do I?" he teased. "Maybe I need some convincing. You're sure you don't want any of those other losers? Just me?"

"Yes, you silly man. Take me out on a real first date, and you'll see that I only have eyes for you."

"Oh, come on, the first one counted, and you know it. The dog debacle was _not_ my fault." He pecked her lips and then tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. "Anyway, it'll be nice to finally 'come out' tomorrow. I had a hard time keeping my hands off you at the bar."

Bella grinned widely. "I can't wait until Rose brings Alice and Emmett over in the morning to find us in bed together. Their heads are going to explode!"

"That Rose is one devious woman. Going behind their backs to clue us in on their bet and planning out tonight's scenario…" Edward shook his head. "I hope she never turns her evil genius on me."

"Oh, this little scheme was nothing. She was holding back since you've only known her for two weeks. At least the police weren't involved this time."

"Great, I can't wait," he said sardonically.

"Yeah, but we do owe her for bringing us together the way she did," Bella pointed out. "I wonder how things would've turned out if we'd met for the first time tonight like we were supposed to."

Edward nuzzled his nose into Bella's hair and laved kisses on her neck. "Oh, I'm sure we would've ended up together one way or another. After all, I'm irresistible."

"And apparently, also very cocky," Bella managed to get out in between quiet whimpers of pleasure.

Edward chuckled and bucked his hips up into her lower body. "Why yes, yes I am."

Bella sucked in a breath as the tip of his proof positive slipped into her entrance. "I see that Mr. Floppy's recovery time is over."

"Mm-hmm. And Mr. Hard and Thick is quite excited to get back in the game," Edward murmured, flipping them over so that Bella was underneath him. "I bet he can make you come two times this round."

She moaned as he thrust deeply inside her.

"That's a bet I'd love to lose."

* * *

 **I'm pretty sure there'll be one more chapter—an outtake of sorts showing how Bella and Edward met through Rose's bet-defeating plan. I've been concentrating on finishing The Fence before going back to any of my other WIPs (all of which WILL be completed, I promise!), but the outtake to this o/s should be short, sweet, and easy to fit in during breaks. Thanks for reading! xxoo**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 - Outtake Pt1**

* * *

"Yes, Mrs. Vasquez, I confirmed with the band last week…DJ backup?...I don't think that's really necessary…true, but we've worked with this group for quite a number of quinceañeras, and I can assure you that they—…yes, ma'am, I understand that everything must be perfect for Sofia, and I—…yes, I suppose it _is_ possible for all six of them to come down with the flu in the next few days, but—…well, if that's what you prefer, I'll arrange a meeting with two DJs for tomorrow…I'll text you the times by close of business today and send an email…of course, Mrs. Vasquez, and you have a wonderful afternoon."

Rosalie resisted the urge to throw her headset across the room and instead slowly laid it on her desk. Normally, she had all the patience in the world for demanding clients, but Mrs. Vasquez had been one too many in a long string of annoyances since she overslept that morning.

The mistake caused her to miss her commuter train, so she had to drive her car and pay a ridiculous fee for all-day parking in the nearest public garage. Normally, her lateness wouldn't be a big deal, but Alice was onsite at a hotel to oversee a convention they'd organized. Rosalie preferred the logistical side of event planning while Alice was much more gregarious, so the division of labor worked out well. She figured she'd have a nice, quiet day getting some work done.

But the employee scheduled to assist Alice at the convention called in sick, so Rosalie had to close up the office for a few hours and dash over to the hotel to help out. The venue was only a few blocks away, but her four-inch heels made it an unpleasant trip. She really should've taken a cab. Being in such a rush, however, the thought didn't occur to her until she was already halfway there and her feet had started aching.

And after an hour with Alice, her head was aching, too.

Apparently, her friend had dreamed the previous night that she'd lost that absurd bet with Emmett over Bella. In the dream, Emmett's apartment resembled one of the homes on that _Hoarders_ show, and she had to use an excavator just to clear a walking path through the mess. Alice had been jittery—more so than usual, that is—and spent every spare moment asking Rosalie inane questions about Emmett's cleanliness. It eventually got so annoying that Rosalie pretended to be interested in a guest speaker's talk on the molecular composition of saliva so that Alice would give her a few minutes' peace.

She'd never really considered dental chemistry to be a fascinating subject and still didn't. To be honest, she hadn't known it was even a thing until just then.

Rosalie was thrilled when she finally got to escape back to the office for the last hour of the work day, but then Mrs. Vasquez called. The woman was a textbook quinceañera-zilla, if such a thing existed. Rosalie had to do a bit of wheeling and dealing to get two reputable DJs to meet with Mrs. Vasquez and pretend their services were available on such short notice, but she managed to pull it off.

She just hoped that Lance Peterson wasn't actually serious about getting naming rights to her firstborn child.

After her email containing the meeting information zipped off to Mrs. Vasquez, Rosalie leaned over her desk, dropped her head into her crossed arms, and let out a long groan.

"Ugh, just shoot me now," she mumbled in an exasperated voice.

"Sorry, I don't own any firearms."

Rosalie shot upright in her seat and found a man in running gear standing in front of her desk—an extremely attractive man, at that. In fact, he was _so_ good-looking that the usually stoic Rosalie found herself doing a double-take.

He noticed and gave her an amused grin.

"I can give it a try with rubber bands if you want," he offered.

"Oh, um, sorry about that," she said, a little flustered and embarrassed. She took a deep breath and smoothed down her hair. "How can I help you?"

"Well, I'm not here for event planning services—as you can probably guess from my clothes," he said with a laugh, glancing down at his attire. "But when I ran by and saw your sign, I had to come in and say hello."

Rosalie's head cocked to the side in bewilderment as she studied him. "Have we met before?" she asked hesitantly. He did seem familiar, but she was relatively certain she'd remember talking to a guy as Really, Really Ridiculously Good-looking as he was.

"Technically, no," he replied, "but I've heard so much about you over the last few weeks from Emmett that I feel like we have."

"Emmett?" It only took a moment for her to figure it out. "Oh! You must be Edward!"

"At your service," he declared with a flourish of his arms.

She stood up quickly from her seat and came around the desk to hug him, but he raised his hands to hold her off.

"I'm sorta gross and sweaty. I'd hate to mess up your nice clothes with guy-slime," he joked.

Rosalie snorted. "guy-slime? That's an interesting way to put it, but a pretty accurate description—especially for Emmett after a workout. Thanks for the consideration. It's great to finally meet you."

"Same here. I just found out the name of your business a few days ago, or I would've introduced myself sooner. This street is on my regular route when I start my runs from the hospital."

"Emmett mentioned you liked to run," Rosalie commented with a grin. "He said something about you kicking his ass on the treadmill yesterday."

Edward ran a hand through his slightly damp hair and smiled agreeably. "Yeah, but he destroys me when it comes to weights, so it's all good." He glanced around the office. "Nice place. I take it your friend isn't here?"

"Alice? No, she's coordinating an event today. She'll be in the rest of the week, though."

"Looks like I'll have to catch her later, then. I've got a 30-hour shift starting tonight, and after that, I'll be crashing until I get to do it again on Friday. Good times, let me tell you." He rolled his eyes. "But I'll definitely see her next weekend."

"Ah, yes. The Big Dinner," Rosalie muttered, mostly to herself. "I can't wait."

Edward looked at her with curiosity in his eyes. "Do I detect a hint of sarcasm there?"

"Ha, you have no idea." She paused and considered her words as an idea took shape in her head. "You have no idea…but what if you _did_? Hmm. What if...what if the players become the played?"

"I'm not sure what you're talking about, but I have a feeling I want in on it." Edward smirked devilishly as he leaned in. "What's the plan, boss?" he asked in a low, conspiratorial voice.

Rosalie blinked and then shook her head. "Whoa there, hot stuff. Is there a dial on that dazzle? You're gonna have to turn it down for this to work." She glanced at the wall clock and pursed her lips in thought. "We should discuss game plans, but first, I need to make a call. What time does your shift start?"

"Not until eight. I was planning to meet up with a friend from the hospital for dinner, but he won't care if I bail."

"Perfect. This is gonna be fun," Rose said, nodding to herself with a smug grin. "You know the Italian restaurant down the street—Antonio's? Meet me there at six, and I'll explain everything."

* * *

 ** _5:53 p.m._**

 ** _R: Running late. Drinks are on me._**

Bella sighed and did her best not to get annoyed at Rosalie's text, even though her friend had practically begged to meet as soon as possible. She'd been in the middle of a very relaxing bubble bath, half-asleep, when her phone started blaring Kelis's _Milkshake_. Of course, Bella had no idea that Rosalie had swiped the phone at some point and programmed a different ringtone for herself. Startled at the unexpected noise, Bella nearly broke her neck jumping out of the tub and sliding around her apartment while dripping wet to figure out its source.

Although they hadn't talked in about two weeks, an incensed Rosalie skipped the standard pleasantries and immediately launched a passionate but rather vague tirade against both Alice and Emmett. She asked Bella to meet her for drinks so she could vent and, if necessary, be talked out of doing anything rash, like supergluing Emmett's dick to his stomach—an idea she was apparently considering.

Although Bella had never met him, she knew her friend well enough and thus did feel some legitimate concern over the state of the man's private bits. Seeing it as the right thing—the _humane_ thing—to do, she reluctantly rinsed herself off in the shower, threw on jeans and a tee shirt, and called a cab to take her to the restaurant.

And then sat by herself for twenty boring minutes at the bar until Rosalie's text came through.

"Figures," Bella muttered to herself, jamming the phone in her back pocket. She leaned her elbows on the bar's shiny surface and began to play with the straw in her glass.

"It's not right for a woman as beautiful as you to be wearing such a frown. Is there any way I can put a smile on your face?"

The smooth, masculine voice near her ear startled Bella, but she was able to keep her surprise from showing. Leaning away from the sound, she turned to see a tall, well-dressed man standing beside her with a cocky smirk on his lips. He nodded toward her mostly-empty glass.

"At the very least, let me buy you another drink. What's your pleasure tonight?"

Bella hesitated for a few seconds as she gave him another quick once-over. He was rather attractive, in a generic sort of way, and had a flashy watch to make it appear he was doing alright financially. And while he seemed nice enough at first blush, something about him made her wary. His words had been a little too practiced, his grin too confident. There was a bit too much _Rico Suave_ in his actions for her to be comfortable.

After all, Paul had been like that, and she'd ended up having all her valuables stolen.

"I'm good for now, but thanks for asking," she said coolly, referring to his drink offer. Angling her body away from him, she pretended to be interested in a baseball game showing on one of the overhead TV screens in hopes that the guy would get the hint and leave her alone.

He didn't.

"My name's Brett, by the way. What's yours?"

Bella took a deep breath and looked over her shoulder to him.

"Look, I hate to be a bitch, but I'm not in a great mood right now and don't feel like talking. Thanks anyway."

Not waiting to see his reaction, she turned back to the screen and stared at the uniformed men on the field. An indignant huff sounded behind her, but thankfully, the guy named Brett didn't say anything else. Bella breathed a sigh of relief when she saw him walk away out of the corner of her eye.

Her shoulders relaxed as tension eased out of her muscles—a tension she hadn't even realized was there. Bella hated the distrust and anxiety she felt around men who seemed interested in her, but after each of the three serious relationships she'd had turned out to be a disaster, she couldn't help it. Whether due to a tendency to fall for losers or just bad luck in general, the end result was the same.

Bella Swan was bitter, jaded, and done with guys.

For the most part, she felt secure in her decision. If she didn't open her heart to anyone, it couldn't be crushed like it had when she walked in on Jake and Leah, both of them her friends since elementary school. Without a significant other, she didn't have to worry about jealousy or extreme possessiveness or any of the creepy stalkerish behavior that dominated her relationship with Mike. And she certainly would be spared the utter hurt and humiliation she'd felt when Paul played her for a fool with smooth, loving words and sticky, stealing fingers.

She was still pissed off that the bastard had taken her grandmother's rings. The way things were looking, those pieces of jewelry had probably been the closest she'd ever come to the institution of marriage.

Bella held back a groan at her depressing thoughts. She was here to support Rosalie, not wallow in self-pity over her own issues.

Looking to be distracted, she tuned in to what was going on in the baseball game. It seemed to be a matchup of ANA—whoever that was—and a team called OAK. They were in the ninth inning, and the OAK team trailed by a run. Bella didn't know much about baseball other than the basics, but even she could feel the growing excitement when the guys in white and green put a man on base with two outs. The next batter up took his time getting ready to hit, causing Bella to slide to the edge of her seat in anticipation.

While waiting for the first pitch—why didn't the batter just step into the box, already?—she learned from the announcers that OAK was the Oakland Athletics and that the ANA abbreviation stood for Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. Since she didn't have a connection to either teams, she decided to go with the underdogs in the situation, the Athletics, when deciding whom she was going to root for.

Finally, the batter stepped up to the plate. In the blink of an eye, the ball whooshed by a late-swinging bat and thudded soundly into the catcher's mitt.

"Argh!" Bella moaned, banging a fist on the bar's surface.

When the next pitch was called a strike, she threw her hands in the air.

"What the hell, ump?" she yelled at the replay on the screen. "That was obviously a ball—are you freakin' blind?"

It felt like an hour before all the players on both sides were ready for the next pitch, but the buildup made the resounding crack of the bat that much sweeter. Bella watched with bated breath as the right fielder ran back, back, back. When the ball sailed into the seats, just over the head of the outfielder, she jumped out of her seat.

"Yes! Home run for the win!" she shouted.

Bella pumped her fist in victory, but as she made the movement, her elbow smacked into her glass of melting ice and sent it flying off the bar. She twisted in an attempt to catch it, but instead only managed to ram her shoulder into a very solid chest. The glass landed in the lap of a man sitting beside her, its contents spilling on his thighs.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry," she gasped. Without stopping to think, Bella grabbed the glass and began pushing ice cubes into it. She wanted to get them off his pants before they had a chance to melt further and make a bigger wet spot. Her fingers dipped in between his legs as she chased after a few of the more slippery ones.

"Whoa, hey there!" the man chuckled, intercepting her hand with his own when she started moving toward his crotch. "I usually don't give up that kind of action until at least the _third_ spilled drink."

"Huh?" Bella stopped at the sound of his voice, which gave her a chance to realize what she was doing and just how inappropriate it was. Face erupting in flames, she jerked her hands away from his lap and took several steps backward.

"Oh wow. I can't believe that I just…uhh…I didn't mean to…damn." She let out a shaky breath and set the glass on the bartop. "I don't even know what to say except that I'm so, so sor—"

The word died on her lips as she finally lifted her gaze up her victim's body and to his face.

He was, without a doubt, the most gorgeous man she'd ever seen. Sparkling green eyes, sharp jaw, messy hair, kissable lips, obviously toned body under an unbuttoned black shirt and white tee—he was a Grade A, one hundred percent prime, top select, Bella-approved hunk of…

"Don't worry about it," he said with an easy smile, soaking up the worst of the liquid with a handful of bar napkins. "I totally understand what it's like to get lost in your passion. An Oakland fan, I take it?"

"Um, not really," Bella admitted sheepishly. "It's just…well, I had to root for _someone_ , you know? So I went with the team that was losing and sort of got caught up in the drama." She rolled her eyes as one side of her mouth turned up in a self-deprecating grin. "I guess I'm weird that way. It's either all-in or nothing, even if I'm watching a sports game I don't know much about."

 _Hmm, that also seems to be my modus operandi with relationships,_ Bella mused as she watched the man's long fingers brush away the napkin lint from his damp thighs.

Catching herself staring, she frowned and turned back toward the bar. _But that's just the way I am, and since I'm done getting screwed over with the "all-in" crap, that leaves me with…nothing._

 _Huh. That actually kind of sucks._

"…a lot like that, too," the man was saying.

Bella made herself concentrate on his words.

"My work is my passion, and I'm completely dedicated to it. That's not to say I don't make time for other things I care about, like my family and friends, but right now, it's the main focus of my life."

Bella nodded absently and then scanned the bar area to see if Rosalie had arrived yet. While the guy beside her had first piqued her interest with his incredible hotness, he also appeared to be somewhat intelligent, good-humored, and forgiving—obviously, since she'd dumped icy liquid on him and he hadn't chewed her out. And so, in her experience, that meant he was hiding some horribly fatal flaw that could rip out a girl's heart…or he was taken. Since neither of those situations appealed to her, she needed to get him off her mind as soon as possible.

"Are you waiting for someone?"

"Uh, yeah, actually," Bella replied breezily, continuing to look although she'd already checked the entire room. "I'm sure she'll be here soon, so…"

She let her voice trail off suggestively, and unlike the Brett guy, this one immediately picked up what she was putting down.

"Ah, gotcha," he said, nodding slowly. "Well, good talking to you, and even though you're not a fan, congrats on the Oakland win."

Although not looking at him, she could hear his wry grin in the tone of his voice. There was also a hint of disappointment, and Bella was surprised to discover that it affected her.

"Thanks. You, too," she blurted out, glancing his way. "Er, I mean, it was also good talking to you, um…"

"Edward," he supplied helpfully.

"Right, Edward. And I'm Bella, just so you know." A sudden, strange wave of insecurity swept over her. "Not saying that you were actually interested in finding out my name, or anything," she sputtered. "I figured, you know, I might as well give it up so you'd have someone to curse in your head when you got your drycleaning bill." Her eyes widened. "Oh shit! I didn't offer to pay for drycleaning!"

The gorgeous man whose name was Edward dismissed her words with a wave of his hand. "It's fine. You don't have to—"

"No, no, I insist!" Bella exclaimed, pulling a somewhat wrinkled wad of bills from her front pocket.

"Really, it's not a big—"

"It was my fault, and you shouldn't have pay for my mistake."

"But I don't—"

"How much does it cost to dryclean a pair of pants—what, seven bucks or so?" She tried to smooth out her bills on the bar's surface and began counting them out.

"Um, Bella? Seriously, I can't take your—"

"Maybe I should give you ten, just in case your place charges more than mi—"

Bella snapped her mouth shut in surprise when Edward reached out and poked her in the nose.

"Ha! Found the 'mute' button in one try!" he cheered with a broad smile. "Now listen to me for a sec, okay? These are an old pair of _washable_ pants that I pulled out of my gym bag an hour ago. I promise you that when I toss them in the machine with the rest of the laundry, they'll come out just fine. So please, put your money away, and don't give any of it another thought."

With that, he gathered the bills in front of her, folded them neatly in half, and used one of his hands to mold her fingers around the collection.

Her forehead scrunched up in wrinkles. She looked from the money in her hand, to his hand, then to his face, and back to his hand.

"You poked me in the nose," she stated rather stupidly.

"Yes, I did."

"You poked my nose."

His mouth twitched in and out of an upward curve, but he managed to pull off a stoic nod. "Well, you weren't listening. I had to improvise."

"Hmph. Aren't you so clever?" she snarked, shooting him a withering glare as she stuffed the cash back into her pocket. There was no real heat behind her words, however, and they both knew it.

Edward didn't say anything further after she finished putting her money away. He took a casual sip from the bottle of water in front of him and shifted his position on the bar stool. Bella understood he was leaving it up to her to continue the conversation, but she wasn't sure what she wanted to do.

Make tracks or engage?

After what seemed like forever but was only about a minute of time, Bella cleared her throat. "So, uh, are you waiting on someone, too, or…?"

"Yeah, I am," he replied, "but I'm starting to wonder if I'm being stood up. She was supposed to meet me here over half an hour ago."

"Oh, are you getting together for a date?" Bella asked, going for polite indifference but not quite pulling it off. She felt like kicking herself. Why should it matter to her if he was on a date? She didn't care one way or the other.

She didn't.

Really.

If Edward noticed her interest, he didn't show it.

"Definitely not a date. It's my best friend's girlfriend. They haven't been together long; I just met her today. Still, he swears she's the one, and knowing him, I bet they'll be married with a kid on the way before the year's out."

"Huh. Must be something in the water around here. Sounds a lot like my best friend and her new guy. I might actually be jealous if it wasn't so nauseatingly sweet and fairytale-ish."

Edward snorted in amusement when she clasped her hands together by her cheek and fluttered her eyelashes.

"Yeah, I get sugar-shock sometimes listening to my friend go on about her," Edward commiserated. "But I try to cut him some slack. I'm sort of the same way when it comes to my work, so I can see where he's coming from. Something in me just clicked, and I knew I wanted to do it for the rest of my life. Sure, I expected the road wouldn't always be easy, and that there'd be days when I wanted to run, but I just _knew_ it was right for me. So, it's not too far of a stretch for me to imagine feeling that way about a person as well. You know what I mean?" He tilted his head toward her, the tenor of his voice intensifying. "What about you, Bella? Is there anything you've felt an undying passion for? Have you ever experienced a rightness about something that was completely natural and absolute…undeniable? Almost like, a calling?"

Bella found herself leaning in, drawn to his compelling tone, the sparking fire in his eyes, and the way his lips moved when he talked. It took her a moment to process what he was saying and the fact that it was her turn to speak.

"Um, yeah, actually," she responded, taking a steadying breath and settling back onto her seat. "I wanted to be a teacher ever since I was a little kid. I'd line up all my stuffed animals in front of a chalkboard to go through the ABCs and 123s." She shook her head and chuckled. "They were very well-behaved students, but not the brightest in the world."

Edward laughed along with her, his eyes crinkling at the edges. "I'm picturing it now. You, smacking a stick against the board, and them, gaping at you with beady but vacant button eyes."

"Pretty much," Bella agreed, grinning.

As the two shared a mirthful glance, the atmosphere began to take on a different feel, as if the air around them was becoming thicker and more charged. Long seconds passed, neither of them moving or speaking.

Bella looked away first.

"So, uh, yeah, I should really touch base with my friend and make sure she's okay. It's not like her to keep me waiting this long."

A flash of disappointment darkened Edward's face before he nodded. "I'd check in, too, except I forgot to get her number." He pulled out his phone and keyed it on. "I could find out from Emmett, though," he said, speaking his thoughts out loud. "I should probably give him a heads up that I'm meeting with his girl, anyway."

"Emmett?" Bella asked, her eyes wide. "Hold on a sec. What's this girl's name? Is it—"

"I'm here now!" sang out a voice that sounded just a little too self-satisfied for Bella's liking. A tall blonde swept up to where they were sitting and plucked the phone from Edward's hand.

"I'll put my number in so you can get ahold of me next time," Rosalie said as she brought up his contacts menu. "After all, we can't have Emmett knowing that you and I have met. Not yet, anyway."

Bella's frown turned into a suspicion-laden scowl. "Whoa, chica. What's going on here?" she asked warily. "You told me we were getting together over drinks so you could bitch about Alice and Emmett. There was no mention of a third party joining us." Her eyes darted to Edward. "No offense. Rose here knows I'm not a big fan of surprises."

"No worries." He shrugged his shoulders and gave her a lop-sided grin. "Though I hope that, as far as surprises go, I'm not a bad one."

Bella rolled her eyes and smirked. "I _guess_ you're alright. As far as surprises go."

"Gee, thanks."

Rosalie watched the exchange with barely contained smugness. "Oh, do you two know each other?" she asked innocently. "How nice. That'll make my plan go much more smoothly."

"Plan? What plan?" Bella asked, glancing between Rosalie and Edward. Her eyes narrowed in thought and then popped open wide. "Wait a damned minute. You...you set me up, didn't you?" She stabbed her finger in Rosalie's direction. "I get it now. This is all an attempt to hook me up with him! You made up some story to lure me here, then _conveniently_ managed to be an hour late. Ugh, you're as bad as Alice." Her hand flew to her mouth, and she gasped. "No, I'll bet you're actually working with her! You contacted me because she knew I'd never suspect _you_ to mess with my love life. So, here I come, waltzing into this bar with my guard down, and then you send this seemingly perfect specimen of a man to chat me up and sweep me off my feet!"

Bella turned her wrath on Edward in the form of a scorching glare. "How dare you try to trick me like this? Dammit! I _knew_ a gorgeous, nice guy like you couldn't possibly be both normal _and_ available. What, lemme guess: you're some sort of underwear model or exotic dancer, right? Or maybe you're…oh my god! Are you an escort? Did she pay you to have sex with me? For your information, I'd never stoop that low, even if it _has_ been over two years!"

Both Rosalie and Edward gaped wide-eyed at Bella as she ranted and raged. When the incensed brunette finally stopped to take a deep breath, they blinked and looked at each other.

Then Rosalie laughed.

And laughed.

It was a full, side-splitting, tear-inducing, chest-heaving bout of raucous howling that caused several heads in the vicinity to turn her way.

Still seething, Bella crossed her arms over her chest and waited.

"I can't believe you thought…scheming with Alice…oh my god…and then you said…male escort…announced your lack of sex…two years…funniest thing ever…"

Rosalie gasped and sputtered as she tried to get words out through her peals of laughter, but finally just waved her hands in the air and gave up.

Edward, for his part, had gotten over his initial shock and was fighting a battle to keep from joining in Rosalie's amusement.

Watching his pathetic struggle to keep his expression neutral and his shoulders from shaking, Bella considered what Rosalie had been attempting to say.

It occurred to her that maybe, _maybe_ , she'd gotten it wrong. Their surprised reactions to her _aha!_ moment seemed very genuine. Rosalie was a good actor, but she took pride in her schemes and didn't lie about having them. And although Bella only had surface impressions of Edward, her gut feelings suggested he'd fess up if called out on something like this. Bella still suspected Rosalie was up to _something_ , but there was a good chance Edward didn't have anything to do with it.

And if that were the case, she owed him a big apology.

"You're not an exotic dancer, are you?"

"Nope," Edward replied, grinning widely.

"Also no to sex worker—right?"

"Yup."

"Underwear model?"

He pursed his lips. "You get half credit on that one. It was one job years ago."

"I see. What about being in league with Rosalie and/or Alice?"

"No to Rosalie, and I haven't met Alice yet."

"Ah." Bella closed her eyes and pressed her hands to her face. "Wow, I'm absolutely stellar when it comes to first impressions. Not only do I throw my drink at you, I also scream in your face and suggest that people pay you for sex. Perfect. Just perfect." Letting her arms fall to her sides, she shook her head and sighed deeply. "I don't think sorry quite covers it, but for what it's worth, I am. Very sorry."

"Don't be," Edward replied, still smiling. "This has been the most, er, _entertaining_ evening I've had in a long time."

"Yeah, I'm sure it was," Bella replied sarcastically.

"Hey, I'm serious. You're beautiful, easy to talk to, and I think your fierceness is very…appealing. In fact, I'll bet that sort of, uh, enthusiasm carries over to _other_ areas of your life."

It was now Bella's turn to gape. She didn't want to make an ass of herself again by assuming he meant what she thought he meant, but the mischievous glint in his eye made her think just that.

Mercifully, Rosalie had recovered by then and interjected herself into the conversation.

"What was that? Did someone mention a bet? I know of a bet you two might be _very_ interested in learning about." She took hold of Bella's hand and tugged her toward an unoccupied table in the bar area of the restaurant. "Let's sit, and I'll tell you all about it."

Bella let herself be led, grateful that Edward was behind her so that he couldn't see her slightly embarrassed, slightly aroused expression.

But he wasn't quite done with her yet. As they moved to the table, he leaned in close enough that he could speak in her ear in a teasing voice.

"So I swept you off your feet, huh?"

Bella groaned and walked faster, with Edward's laugh trailing behind her.

* * *

 **As usual, I wrote more than planned! I *think* there's only one more part to this outtake. I want to finish this up so I can return to The Fence! :^)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Personalities in Disorder - Outtake Part 2**

* * *

In just about any other circumstance, Edward would've been paying attention. Rosalie was obviously important to Emmett, and he wanted to know her better. She seemed like a fun person, and it didn't hurt that she was _very_ easy to look at. Best of all, she wanted to prank her boyfriend.

Edward was always up for giving Emmett grief.

But other than catching a few words here and there—enough to get the gist of why Rosalie called Bella and him together—he barely realized she was talking.

He was far too engrossed in the beautiful brunette sitting beside him.

Truthfully, Bella hadn't caught his eye the moment he stepped into the restaurant, but then, he'd been looking for the blonde-haired Rosalie. When he realized she wasn't there yet, he bought a bottle of water from the bartender and took a seat. A beer would've been preferable, but it was too close to the start of his shift at the hospital for that.

He'd just gotten settled on his stool when a surprisingly robust groan rumbled out from the diminutive figure just to his left. Glancing over his shoulder, he found an attractive, fresh-faced woman with dark brown hair pulled back in a ponytail. It was slightly damp and had a distinctive floral scent, as if she'd gotten out of the shower not too long ago. The girl looked to be young, college-student age maybe, and warning bells immediately sounded in his head.

 _Too young, lifestyles too different. Don't even go there_.

Frowning, Edward turned back to his bottled water and took a distracted sip. He was surprised that he'd had to caution himself; usually thoughts of "going there" didn't enter his mind in the first place. His work schedule was far too busy and inconsistent for him to consider any sort of real relationship.

But then she began cursing at the overhead screen. Despite his former vow of disinterest, he found himself drawn to her heated passion.

They sat too close together for him to watch inconspicuously, so he settled for peeking at her from the corners of his eyes.

Engrossed in a baseball game, she was leaning forward in her seat, as close to the TV as she could get without standing up. Edward saw only part of her face, but he could tell she wore a fierce expression. Somehow, it made her even more attractive.

What he liked most, however, was that she didn't seem to care what others thought about her. The girl appeared to be alone in the restaurant, yet still showed her emotions as openly as if she was surrounded by friends or in the privacy of her own room. Being so used to the uptight "kiss your superior's ass" politics of the medical profession, especially as a junior doctor, Edward found her zero-fucks-given attitude very refreshing.

He was considering throwing caution to the wind and striking up a conversation with her when two things happened almost simultaneously: a freezing liquid doused his lap, and a warm body slammed into his chest.

His instincts had him ignoring the frigid mess spreading over his pants in favor of trying to steady the girl, but she'd jerked away before he had a chance to touch her. However, he wasn't too disappointed because then _she_ was touching _him_ , and oh, what a nice touch it was.

In fact, it was so nice that his balls were attempting the impossible and trying to crawl their way back out of his body, where they'd gone to hide from the icy cold.

With each attempt to clean him off, her hands had swept tantalizingly closer to a waking cock that seemed determined to meet them halfway. If her face hadn't been so red and embarrassed, Edward might have thought the incident was a crafty plan to feel him up.

And given how attracted he was to her, he might've been A-okay with that.

But there was something about this girl—a girl he hadn't even talked to yet—that made him want to take his time, do things "right," and try the unthinkable.

He wanted to ask her out on a date.

It ended up being harder than he thought. That carefree personality he had admired changed almost as soon as he opened his mouth. True, there'd been a moment when he imagined he could see his own interest reflected in her eyes, when he felt hope spark inside him, but the moment didn't last. He watched in dismay as figurative shutters closed down around her. The wariness that had dimmed the light in her eyes spoke of experience and maturity, belying her very youthful appearance.

Edward wondered if she might a few years older than he originally thought. He hoped so.

Still, the stay-away vibes rolling off her were so strong that Edward didn't have much of a choice. He didn't want to make her uncomfortable by forcing his company on her. Hanging around like a clueless, attention-starved puppy wasn't high on his list, either.

Yet when he reluctantly decided to give her some space, she threw a lifeline by drawing out their conversation with a flustered attempt to pay him for drycleaning. The subsequent rambling was so damned adorable that he couldn't help slip in a few innocent touches on the hand and even her nose.

The girl—Bella, she'd told him—didn't seem to mind the contact, but there was an awkward moment when he could see her trying to decide whether to stay or go. Edward looked outwardly calm while she debated it; in reality, he felt anxious about a female for the first time since his teenage years.

To his relief, Bella turned back to him, and they had continued to chat. He wasn't an overly talkative person in general, but his unusual nervous energy had his jaw flapping. Luckily for him, she didn't seem to mind. In fact, he could tell she was letting down her guard, opening up to him. And the more that happened, the stronger the pull toward her became. There was evenone particularly heavy moment when Edward had to stop himself from tugging her onto his lap and discovering for himself if her lips tasted as delicious as they looked.

It was a novel situation for him—one that took an even stranger turn when Rosalie showed up.

Bella apparently connected some dots the wrong way and launched into a glorious, off-kilter rant that once again caught the attention of his dick. Edward couldn't believe he was having such a hard time keeping its reactions under control. Somewhere in the middle of his aroused confusion, it occurred to him to be glad he'd opted for jeans instead of changing straight into his work slacks. The large tent he would've pitched might have stolen the spotlight from Bella's misplaced fury.

Rosalie soon gave her friend more appropriate targets as she described Alice and Emmett's bet. Edward watched Bella's expressive face as it showed curiosity, then disbelief, a touch of embarrassment, and finally annoyance.

"Are you friggin' serious?"

Rosalie arched an eyebrow but didn't say a word. She didn't need to; Bella already knew the answer.

"Of course you're serious," Bella muttered. "This is Alice we're talking about. She's like some sort of hyperactive Chihuahua that's always trying to stick her big fat wet nose in other people's business." Bella huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. "I wish they made shock collars for people."

Edward snorted at the description. Though he'd never met Alice, he could picture a tiny person bouncing around on all fours and trying to jump into everyone's lap.

"And just what are you smiling about, Mister Smooth Operator?" Bella grumbled. " _Your_ friend paid you a compliment with his bet. One of mine thinks I'm a frigid bitch."

"To be honest, I think that, too," Rosalie commented, smirking.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Shut up, wench. I'm giving you a pass today since you're not the one treating me like some sort of psychology experiment."

"That's right, you'd better be nice to me," Rosalie said. "Not only did I just out their silly little bet, I've also got a plan for getting them back." She glanced at Bella, then looked at Edward with deviousness in her eyes. "And contrary to your earlier guess, it's _not_ the sort plan that involves hiring male prostitutes to clear out the cobwebs from your nether regions."

"Oh my _god_ , Rose!" Bella groaned. She balled up a damp cocktail napkin and threw it at her friend. "I can't believe you just said that—especially in front of a stranger. You're back on my shit list."

"Aw, come on, babe," Rosalie replied, tossing her hair over her shoulder. "Edward's cool. He hangs with Emmett, for christ's sake. And you know I'm just playin' with ya. You're my boo."

Bella nose scrunched up as she stuck her tongue out. "Go to hell."

Edward took in Bella's sardonic expression and frowned at Rosalie. It was obvious that Bella wasn't really as bothered as she pretended to be, but he didn't like the attack on her. And as much as he _really_ liked seeing her riled up, he felt compelled to say something in her defense.

"Seriously, Rose, that _was_ pretty harsh," he said. "Inappropriate and unnecessary, too. There's nothing wrong with stepping away from the dating game, and it's also fine if someone isn't into casual sex without a relationship. I know that a person as beautiful and interesting as Bella can't be lacking in offers, so you should respect her choice to take a break, no matter how long it turns out to be."

Rosalie stared blankly at Edward for a few moments before a shrewd, knowing grin formed on her lips.

But Bella looked wary again.

"Oh, so now you're compassionate and full of compliments, too?" She shook her head in disbelief. "Unicorns aren't real, you know."

Edward smirked charmingly at her. "Hmm. I don't know about unicorns, but I'm definitely real." He pushed up his sleeve and held out his arm to her. "Go ahead. Pinch me," he teased.

Bella saw the challenge in his eyes and felt her heartbeat quicken. She'd never been one to back down, and her bad experiences with guys only made her resolve stronger. It also didn't hurt that Edward had a nicely muscled forearm, one that begged to be touched.

"If you insist," Bella said with a nonchalant shrug that didn't quite mask her eagerness. She reached over to take a fold of his skin between her thumb and forefinger.

And then she pinched.

Hard.

"Holy hell!" Edward yelped in surprise. He pulled back and examined his arm in awe. "Damn, woman, I think you busted open a vein! I said to pinch me, not take a biopsy sample."

Bella laughed at his pained and pouty expression. "And now you've discovered the real reason I'm single," she joked. "There aren't any men out there who can handle me."

Grinning for a number of reasons, he opened his mouth to reply, but Rosalie jumped in before he could say anything.

"Alright, alright. Quit it with the foreplay already. I'm glad you two are getting along and all, but I need the opposite of that when it comes time to pull this off. In fact, I'm going to need the opposite of _you_." She poked each of them on the shoulder.

"And just what do you mean by that?" Bella growled, glaring at her friend. Her question was directed at more than one of the things Rosalie said. She hadn't missed the comment about foreplay.

"Oh, you mean it isn't obvious?" Rosalie said, her voice dripping with mock innocence. "My mistake. Anyway, what I _meant_ was that you're going to act in a way that makes both of them lose the bet. Edward, instead of flashing your lady-charmer personality and oozing sex appeal all over the place like Emmett expects, you're going to be awkward and weird, geeky even. And because you have commit-o-phobia, I want you to pretend that you're ready to throw your bachelor status out the window when you see Bella. I want you smitten and desperate."

"Hey, I do _not_ have commitment issues," Edward retorted, his eyes darting to Bella to gauge her reaction. He didn't want her to get any negative ideas about him, especially when he was beginning to feel more and more like Bella just might a person he could commit to. "When something, or some _one,_ is important to me, I'm a very dedicated man."

"Whatever you say, Romeo," Rosalie drawled, disinterested. "All I care about is that you can get them to buy your act. You've got the easier job, anyway. Bella, here, is the one who'll need to undergo a complete personality makeover if she wants to be convincing."

"Convincing…how exactly?" Bella asked with a scowl.

"Alice is positive you'll blow off Edward with your man-hating attitude. But you're going to come waltzing in like sex on legs, looking hot and ready to party. I've already got a dress in mind that will look amazing on you—like, instant-male-boner amazing."

Edward was grateful that neither woman seemed to notice his hand slide under the table to shift his instant male boner into a more comfortable position. Bella already looked great to him in her tee shirt and jeans; the thought of her wearing a body-hugging, cleavage-showing outfit was almost too much for his brain to process just then.

Unbeknownst to him, Bella was thinking along similar lines. After she'd kicked Mike the control freak out of her life, she refused to care what other people thought of the clothes she wore. Even when she'd been with Paul, who nearly always donned high-end threads, she dressed to suit herself. If he had a problem with her wearing sweats to the park while he went in a polo shirt and khakis, well, that was on him.

But the idea of dressing up for Edward excited her. For the first time in ages, she wished she'd put on a cuter outfit before going out. It wasn't that she felt she wasn't good enough or planned to change who she was, but she also didn't want to give Edward the impression that she was a slob. Bella knew she cleaned up pretty well and looked forward to giving him a peek of the goods.

There was only one small detail that had to be fixed first…

"We need to do this at a bar or club," Bella mused out loud. "It'd be weird and look suspicious as hell if I got decked out for dinner at my place, even if it is to meet the two new boyfriends. And, if we're in a place with a bunch of other guys, I can get my flirt on with them. That would really blow Alice's mind!"

Edward scowled. He was _not_ thrilled about Bella's proposal to hit on random men. But he couldn't really speak up about it without looking too much like the smitten and desperate character he was supposed to play. It's not like he had any claim on her.

Not yet, anyway.

An alarm on his phone sounded, and Edward wasn't happy about what it meant. For the first time ever, he had the urge to call off work with a fake illness. He'd much rather stay at the restaurant and get to know Bella better.

"Oh crap," Rosalie suddenly blurted out, jumping up from her seat. "I totally forgot I promised to take my neighbor's dog outside since he's working late." She grabbed her purse and gave Edward a quick hug before reaching over to do the same to Bella. "Sorry to bail on you like this, but Lucas will crucify me if Brodie does his business on the carpet. Edward, it was great meeting you again. Now that we've got each other's digits, I'll touch base with you about everything in a few days. Bella, hon, you and I will get together soon. Catch ya later, bitches!"

And with that, she was gone.

Edward stared at the spot where she'd disappeared into the crowd and then looked over to Bella with raised eyebrows. "Your friend, Rosalie—she's…something else."

"Yeah. Something scary," Bella chuckled. "But she grows on you after a while."

"If you say so. Sounds like you're the only normal one in the group, huh?"

Bella shrugged. "Nah. I just hide it better than the other two."

Their banter was interrupted by Edward's alarm ringing again. "Damn," he muttered, pulling out his phone to silence it. "Sorry, but I need to leave, too, or I'll be late for my shift."

Bella bit her lower lip to keep from frowning. She wasn't at all ready to see him go.

"Where are you headed to?" she asked, glancing at him as he stood up from the table. She reluctantly followed his lead.

"I work at Swedish Medical Center, First Hill Campus."

"Oh yeah? Not too far away, then. What's your job there?"

"Pediatric surgery. I started my fellowship almost two months ago."

A host of doctor fantasies suddenly flooded her mind, but she pushed them away with effort to focus on the conversation. Oh, they'd get their time in the spotlight, alright, and probably plenty of it, but not until she was safe at home in her bed. Alone.

"Wow, that's amazing," she replied to him as they slowly made their way out of the restaurant through the crowd. "I'm the sort of person you'd never want near your body with a sharp object."

"Aw, you can't be that bad," Edward said with a grin. "How about you? Do you work…or are you still in school?"

"Oh god no," she exclaimed, shuddering. Then she laughed. "Well, I guess technically I'm still in school, but not as a student. I finished my Master's in Education and taught high school chemistry at a Florida public school for a year before coming here. I'll be starting my job new job teaching middle school science in about three weeks."

"Really? So that makes you—what?—around twenty-five or twenty-six?"

Bella heard an odd note in his voice and frowned. "I turn twenty-five in September…why?" she asked warily.

"Oh, nothing, it's just…I thought you might still be in college. You look young, so it was hard to tell."

"Were you _hoping_ I was still in college?" Bella asked, her expression darkening. She knew the guy couldn't be as great as he seemed; maybe he had a weird fetish for coeds or something.

"What? No!" Edward said quickly. "I mean, not that it would've mattered, but I'm glad you're closer to my age. Which is thirty-one, in case you were wondering," he added as he held the door for her to walk outside.

"Hmm." Bella tilted her head, pondering the possible meaning behind his words. He sounded so genuinely flustered that her defensiveness melted away. "Why is it a good thing?" she asked, leaving out the previous harshness from her tone.

"Huh?"

"Why is it good that I'm older than you thought?"

They'd come to a stop on the sidewalk. Edward shoved his hands in his pockets and gave his best impression of a nonchalant shrug.

"Well, now I know that when we all meet up at the club next weekend, I won't have worry about you getting busted with a fake ID." He smirked roguishly at Bella to let her know he was joking. "I can't be hanging around with criminals; hafta protect my rep, you know."

"Oh really? I see how you are. But at least I won't need a walker to make it through the door like you, old man," she snarked with a playful eyeroll.

A number of different comebacks sat on the tip of Edward's tongue, but he held them back and grinned wryly, instead. While he'd love to continue flirting with her all night, there just wasn't time for it.

"Sadly, this _young, virile_ man has to hurry to work or he's going to be late," he said with a sigh. "Are you alright to get home? Do you have a ride?"

Bella nodded. "I'm good. If a cab doesn't come by in a few minutes, I'll call for one."

"Damn, I wish I wasn't running behind, or I'd drive you." He paused as he looked into her eyes. "I really enjoyed meeting you tonight, Bella. And...I'd love to see you again soon—outside of Rosalie's fun little schemes, that is. Would you be interested in having dinner with me?"

Bella's breath caught in her throat, and her heart took off to the races. Sure, she'd been asked out plenty of times, but Edward was the first man in almost three years that she even considered saying yes to. And she didn't just want to say yes, she wanted to shriek it to him. The only thing holding her back was that damned fear of being hurt or taken for a fool again. She could see herself falling for him, but if he ended up screwing her over after she finally let someone back into her heart, well…that'd be _really_ bad. Like, crushingly so.

"Um…"

She saw Edward's body tensed as if getting ready for rejection, and the thought of hurting him just about gutted her.

 _What the hell is wrong with me?_ she thought disgustedly. _When did I become such a wuss?_

Yes, she'd been trampled on in the past, but it was time to get over it. It was time to try again. And Edward was the one who made her want to try—something no one else had even come close to doing.

"Dinner would be great," she breathed. "Um, when were you thinking?"

The delighted look in his eyes chased away any remaining anxiety over accepting his offer. Her stomach flip-flopped excitedly in her abdomen as she waited for his reply.

"I don't get off work until Thursday morning. Are you free that evening?"

"Thursday is perfect."

"Great," Edward said, giving her a dazzling smile. "Can I get your phone number? I'll call you sometime tomorrow, and we can work out the details."

They quickly exchanged information and faced each other again. Edward reached out to take Bella's hand.

"I'm really looking forward to seeing you again," he murmured. "Talk to you soon, okay?"

He leaned forward to place a soft kiss on her cheek, then with one last rakish grin, turned to hurry to the parking deck.

Bella watched him go, a huge smile on her face.

* * *

 **I'm such a liar! There's one more small outtake part after this, the morning after scene with the whole crew, and that's all, darnit. (I must keep reminding myself that one-shot has a ONE in it, lol.)**

 **I do want to point out a little boo-boo I made. I always try my best to be as factual as possible, but it turns out that while Swedish Medical Center does have a Pediatric Surgery department, they don't offer fellowships for this specialty. Can we pretend they do? :^)**

 **Finally, I just want to say that I'm amazingly grateful to those who read my stories, and especially to those kind enough to leave a review. I've become terrible about replying to every person, every time, but my goal this chapter is make sure I do. Thanks again for all your support!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Personalities in Disorder - Outtake Part 3**

* * *

They didn't say a word as they stood up from their seat. The walk out of the movie theater was made in silence. The two even managed to keep it together on the way to Edward's car.

But once the doors were safely shut and they hazarded a glance at each other, it all came rushing out.

"Oh my _god_!" Bella cried, bursting into laughter. "What the hell did we just watch? That was easily the worst movie _ever_. Hands down, no-doubt-about-it most horrifying thing my brain has ever been tortured with."

Edward's whole body shook from the force of his laugh. "I think I'm going to need therapy for this," he howled from his hunched-over position in the driver's seat. "Can I sue the film company when I start suffering from PTSD? The production crew must be scarred for life. How the hell did anyone with a functional brain in their head look at that script and then want to make a film out of it?"

"I know, right? That movie makes Sharknado look like an Academy Award contender! Ugh, I can't decide which was worse—the plot or the dialogue."

"Plot, definitely," Edward declared, holding his side as he tried to catch his breath. "If you could even call it a plot. Take away the clown car chase, the singing dolphins, and the phallic-looking aliens, all you have left is a guy and a girl who obviously had the hots for one another but were too stupid to say anything for ninety painful minutes."

Bella wiped tears from her eyes and giggled. "Yeah, but if they'd admitted it right away, there wouldn't've been a movie. The plot was the love story, so I can accept that. What I couldn't handle were the horrible lines. 'My feelings for you are like diarrhea, I just can't hold it all in.' Are you _kidding_ me?"

Hands flying up to cover his ears, Edward squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head back and forth. "Nooo! Make it stop!" he wailed theatrically. "You're killing the five brain cells that actually managed to survive that cinematic tragedy!"

A new wave of laughter overtook them, and several minutes passed before they were able to calm down again.

"Wow," Edward remarked when he was finally coherent again. "I really struck out on my first date movie choice, huh? I guess that's what I get for being years out of practice."

"Years?" Bella glanced over from the passenger seat with a quizzical look on her face. "Did you just get out of a long-term relationship, or…?"

"No, not unless you count my profession as a relationship," he replied with a smile and an easy shrug. "I didn't have the time or energy for much of anything except moving ahead in with my career and hanging out with a few good friends. At Johns Hopkins—that's where I did my surgical residency—the atmosphere was rather competitive and stressful for upcoming doctors. Most of my free time was spent studying and catching up on sleep. On the rare occasion I went out, it was usually just to relax with friends. I did get talked into blind dates a few times but never enjoyed the experience. It always felt a little forced to me—like there was an underlying pressure for things to work out."

Bella nodded. "I hear you about the pressure part. That's a big part of the reason why I won't let my friends set me up on dates. Some people—ahem, Alice—jump on my case about being single, but it's not like I'm going to date just to get the meddlers off my back. Of course, it also doesn't help that my past relationships were so bad. After three big fails in a row, I needed a break from the all the drama."

"I'm sorry that you had bad experiences," Edward said sincerely. He paused for a moment. "On my behalf, however, I _would_ like to point out that I'm a very low-drama guy." His features had rearranged themselves into a deviously angelic expression. "Just so you know."

"Low drama, huh?" One corner of Bella's mouth quirked upward. "Is that another way of telling me you're boring?"

" _No_ ," he replied, rolling his eyes playfully. "I'm saying that I don't sweat the small stuff. I like to keep my intensity focused on the important things in my life."

"The important things...like…your career…"

From the way her words slowed and her brows drew together, he could tell Bella's mind had drifted off on a tangent. And based on the frown tugging at her lips, it wasn't hard for him to guess in which direction it had drifted.

Edward closed his eyes and groaned internally. He wished there was some way to physically kick his own ass.

He just _knew_ she was thinking of him as an antisocial workaholic, someone who didn't have long-term relationship potential…and he couldn't blame her. After all, he was the one who'd gone on about how dedicated he was to his job within the first five minutes of meeting her, then mentioned it several times since. And though claiming he was capable of dividing his devotion, Edward couldn't actually point to a single example where that had been true. For the last eighteen years of his life, ever since he'd first fallen in love with medicine, his goal to be a top-rate surgeon had taken priority over everything else.

Only now, his priorities seemed to be shifting.

Before it actually happened, he never would've believed such a thing was possible. But Bella had literally and figuratively jolted his system when she knocked her drink into his lap. Within the course of an hour, he'd become fascinated with the contrast of her spirited personality and dry wit—and how they perfectly complemented his own nature. He also found her extremely attractive and was eager to discover if there were any other ways they fit together well.

It hadn't been easy leaving her that night to go to work. A shift at the hospital never passed more slowly, and the texts they exchanged while he was on break only made him more anxious to see her again. With such a buildup in his mind, it hardly seemed likely that their date could live up to expectation.

But it did, and then some.

Edward couldn't remember the last time he'd had so much fun, had felt so… _free_. After talking and laughing their way through dinner, he and Bella went to see the abysmal yet unforgettable movie. It surprised him to experience a case of nerves when the lights dimmed. Despite his usual smooth charisma around the opposite sex, he felt like an awkward teenager as they sat together in the dark theater. It was both strange and a little alarming how his stomach fluttered and his heart thudded quickly in his chest. He even struggled though an uncharacteristic debate with himself on whether it was too soon to implement the classic movie-hand-hold maneuver. Eventually, caution won out—he hadn't wanted to come off too strongly on a first date—but now Edward was wondering if he'd blown a golden opportunity to give her an obvious sign of his growing feelings.

Well, he'd just have to give her obvious words, instead.

He couldn't let their evening end without telling her how he was interested in _more_ with her. Edward considered himself to be a man who understood his mind and was confident in who he was as a person. He'd never been hesitant about going after what he wanted…and the more time he spent with Bella, the more his mind—and his body—wanted her.

Taking a deep breath, Edward opened his eyes and prepared to explain how, contrary to whatever impression he'd made earlier, he was someone who had all the long-term relationship potential she might need.

Bella, however, spoke first.

"So, I was thinking some dessert and coffee would be really good," she said in a rushed, overly bright manner. "I made some super fudgey brownies today, and they'd be amazing heated up with ice cream. I've also got cookies if that's more your style. Both chocolate chip and peanut butter. So yeah, what do you think—do you want to head back to my place now for, uh…dessert?"

She stared over at him with wide, unblinking eyes. Caught up in her penetrating gaze, Edward got the impression she was asking about more than just brownies. And when the tip of her tongue poked out to sweep over her full lower lip just before teeth drew the pink flesh into her mouth, he was sure of it.

The very moment this realization sank in, his body reacted accordingly. Any and all thoughts of having a serious discussion flew out of his head. Shifting in his seat, Edward did make a valiant attempt to keep his expression neutral. But it wasn't easy, what with his dick suddenly trying to poke a hole through his pants and all.

"Um, yeah, sure, that sounds great," he blurted out, also bobbing his head up and down to make sure there was absolutely no misunderstanding. "Dessert sounds…great."

"Okay, perfect, let's go!" Bella chirped in a higher pitch than normal. "If you're a chocolate fan, you're going love these brownies. They're so rich that I actually get a little sick if I eat too many of them. Obviously, I use Ghirardelli chocolate; it almost isn't worth it to make them with any other brand. I mean, if you're gonna do something, you'd better do it right..."

Bella continued to babble on about brownies and cookies and other baked goods as Edward began the drive to her apartment. He nodded his head every so often and hoped that it looked like he was paying attention. About five minutes into the journey, she seemed to run out of things to say and turned her head to stare out the window. An increasingly heavy silence filled the car.

Edward barely noticed the thick tension between them; his senses were too overwhelmed by a different kind of thick tension—one that was throbbing painfully against his leg. It had been a while since he'd gotten any sort of release not brought about by his own hand. As he'd told Bella, Edward tended not to go out much, and the months leading up to his recent move cross-country had been especially hectic.

In fact, he couldn't exactly remember how long ago his last sexual encounter had been…at least twelve months, if not more. He tried to recall the occasion, but his mind came up understandably blank. After all, it was dealing with as much as it could handle between keeping the car from driving off the road and trying to hear Bella over the deafening sound of his blood supply rushing south.

When they finally parked in the parking lot of her apartment complex, his brain made one last heroic attempt to take back control from his dick. He reached out for Bella's hands and held them in both of his before she had the chance to open the car door.

"Hey," he began shakily, "As much as I can't wait to go inside and, um, have dessert, there's something I need to tell you first."

"Wait! I know what you're going to say, and it's really not necessary," Bella insisted with a vigorous shake of her head. "We're both single adults who aren't interested in dating. There's nothing wrong with getting together to scratch an itch, right?"

Edward frowned. "Well, no, there's nothing wrong with that, but I don't want—"

"I know you don't," she jumped in quickly, cutting him off. "Trust me, I understand completely. Your career is your top priority, and I admire your dedication. You don't have to worry about me interfering with your plans or being all clingy. I promise, there will be zero weirdness from me when you leave tonight…or in the morning…whenever you want."

"Uh, that's great, but I—"

His attempt to speak was interrupted once again, except this time, Bella had nothing to do with it. A terrified shriek followed by loud barking startled them both, and their attention was drawn to the nearing figure of an elderly woman chasing after two dogs.

"Mrs. Cope?" Bella gasped, staring out her window. "Oh my god—Sadie!"

As the dogs got closer, Edward could see that the smaller of the two, a furry Sheltie, was desperately trying to get away from a larger black and white mixed breed. The Sheltie raced toward his car, probably in hopes of hiding under it, but its pursuer was rapidly narrowing the gap between them.

"Shit!" Bella cried. She could see that the little dog wouldn't make it in time. Without the slightest bit of hesitation, she threw open her door and leaped out to intercept.

"Bella, stop!" Edward yelled after her while scrambling out of the car himself. "You're going to get hurt!"

She didn't slow down or respond—not that he really expected she would. Bella seemed to him like the kind of person who wouldn't be afraid to jump right into the middle of things, no matter the situation. And while he admired that sort of courage, she was facing a good fifty pounds of teeth and muscle. Edward couldn't stand the thought of anything happening to her. He just hoped he could reach the aggressive dog before she did.

For one promising second, it looked like he would get his wish, that he would overtake her, but then the Sheltie veered off to the left, away from them both. Reacting quickly, Bella spun on the ball of her foot and changed course. Edward wasn't able to do the same. His momentum caused him to stumble forward for a few steps before he could rejoin the pursuit.

Even with her fancy footwork, however, Bella was too late to stop the large dog from lunging at the Sheltie and catching it by the throat. The black and white mutt wrenched the small dog off its feet and shook it violently, eliciting helpless yelps of pain.

"Sadie!" screamed the older woman, still a distance back from the scene.

Bella ran full-tilt and threw herself at the attacking dog. Landing on its hind end, she wrapped her arms around the animal's chest and wrestled it to a stop.

"Let go, dammit. Let her go!" Bella shouted while trying to pin the dog under her so that she could work on freeing Sadie. The enraged beast struggled and thrashed in her grip but didn't loosen its jaws.

Falling to his knees beside Bella, Edward went straight for the mutt's head. He grabbed the top of its mouth with one hand, the bottom with the other, and strained to break the vice-like hold on Sadie's neck. It took him two attempts, but finally he was able to open the mouth wide enough to pull the little dog out.

A small crowd of people had gathered by then, drawn to the barking and screaming. One man moved in to help Bella drag the attacking dog away. Edward was extremely grateful because he had a dire situation on his hands. Blood spurted in pulses from Sadie's neck, and he knew right away that a carotid artery had been damaged. To have any chance at surviving, she needed to go to an emergency vet immediately.

His knowledge of dog anatomy was limited, and the light from the overhead street lamps didn't provide much more than a faint yellow glow. Doing his best to feel under the long, blood-slickened fur, he located the general area of the wound and began to pinch folds of flesh in an effort to stop the bleeding, or at least slow it down.

"Oh, my poor Sadie!" cried the dog's owner, taking in the gruesome sight as she arrived. "Is she going to be okay?"

Bella, who had just relinquished her hold on the animal to someone else, walked over to the distraught elderly woman and took her hand in comfort.

"Where's the closest animal hospital?" Edward asked tersely. "Sadie needs go there right away."

"I don't know," the woman wailed. "I've never had to use one before! Is she going to die?"

"Try to calm down, Mrs. Cope. We're doing what we can." Bella pulled out her phone and tapped on the screen to look up the information Edward had requested. "There's a twenty-four-hour hospital about ten minutes away."

"Good, let's go," he said to Bella. "I can't move my hands from her neck, so you'll have to carry Sadie to the car and drive us."

Carefully, Bella picked up the limp dog and hurried to the parking lot. Mrs. Cope followed behind them. Bella headed toward her car, but Edward stopped her.

"No, take my car. I have some supplies we might need."

Bella hesitated. "But the blood…your seats…" She glanced at his spotless BMW with its creamy beige leather interior.

"It's fine, I promise. But we need to hurry; she's still bleeding."

When they reached his car, Bella put Sadie across Edward's lap in the back seat. He then had her grab a plastic tackle box from his trunk, as well as a towel.

"There should be a bunch of four by four gauze pads in the box. Can you get them for me?"

"What is it? What's wrong now?" Mrs. Cope cried worriedly from the passenger seat of the car.

"Sadie's long fur makes it hard for me to see the wound and stop the bleeding," Edward explained calmly. "I think direct pressure over the entire area will be more helpful."

Bella handed off the gauze to Edward and jumped behind the steering wheel. "Edward's a surgeon," she told Mrs. Cope, pride in her voice. "He knows what he's talking about."

The reassurance helped, but Mrs. Cope was still worked up and shook in her seat the entire way to the animal hospital. Edward patiently answered as many of her harried questions as he could while Bella called ahead to prepare the vet team for their arrival. She also informed Mrs. Cope's daughter, Hannah, who immediately left her house to meet them.

When they arrived at the hospital, Bella took charge of helping Mrs. Cope fill out the paperwork and left the medical talk to Edward and the vets. She overheard them mention vascular trauma and hypovolemic shock and transfusions but didn't understand much of it. The adrenaline rush she'd felt when first charging after the dogs was wearing off, and it was all she could do to keep her mind off the bloody scene she'd witnessed.

About twenty minutes into Sadie's surgery, Hannah stormed into the lobby of the animal hospital. She was a tall, large woman who wasted no time engulfing her mother into a hug that practically lifted the smaller lady off her feet.

"Oh, Momma," she sniffled loudly, "I'm so sorry about your poor, sweet little Sadie. How could such a terrible thing happen to such a nice doggie?"

"It was the worst thing ever!" Mrs. Cope exclaimed. All the calm Bella had managed to bring about in the woman was gone the moment she saw her daughter. "We were out for a walk, minding our own business, and the most vicious creature appeared out of nowhere. He was dead set on having Sadie for dinner, I tell you! My poor dear took off at a run, but that wretched beast was so much bigger. I was sure she was a goner until lovely brave Bella here and her handsome gentleman friend came to the rescue…"

Mrs. Cope continued to tell the tale, but suddenly, lovely brave Bella was no longer listening. Instead, she stared hard at the sight of the _very_ handsome gentleman who was now clad in a pair of light green scrubs. Apparently, someone had given him an extra set to wear so that he didn't have to sit around in blood-saturated clothing. Bella approved of both the kind gesture and the way the thin cotton material stretched across his chest. She felt a rush of gratitude toward whomever that wonderful soul was and briefly considered sending the entire hospital staff a gigantic fruit basket.

A young female vet tech that Bella hadn't noticed began to address their group. She told Mrs. Cope that Sadie had been stabilized and was undergoing surgery to repair her neck wounds, including the punctured artery. With an admiring gaze at Edward that Bella wasn't at all thrilled about, the vet tech explained that his quick actions had saved the Sheltie's life. Bursting into a fresh set of tears, Mrs. Cope and Hannah all but smothered Edward with hugs and kisses.

Bella thought he deserved every bit of praise and appreciation, of course, but was eager to show it to him in a different way—one that required a decent measure of privacy. Just before the dog attack happened, she'd been about to drag the man to her bedroom and have her wicked way with him—an idea she could tell he fully supported.

Ending the evening with sex was never the plan, but Bella had come to a decision when they'd sat in the parking lot of her apartment, before the dog incident. While she could see herself falling for Edward—hell, she already was—there no point getting lost in the fantasy of a relationship that would never be. His focus was on his work, and it didn't matter she'd finally found someone who made her want to try again.

So instead of pining away and feeling sorry for herself, Bella intended to make the most of an amazing night with an intelligent, fun, gorgeous guy.

And now that Sadie was out of the woods, she couldn't wait to get that amazing night started. As long as Edward was willing, she wanted to make a respectable dent in the sex deficit she'd experienced over the last few years.

"…didn't really do much. Bella was the real hero," Edward was saying. "She put herself in danger and stopped the other dog from continuing his attack. I just gave her a hand afterward."

"Oh, Bella!" Mrs. Cope cried, turning her attention to her neighbor. "How can I ever thank you enough?"

The brunette respectfully accepted Mrs. Cope and Hannah's gratitude even though her impatience was rising. She didn't want to be rude, but it was difficult faking interest when Mrs. Cope launched into a detailed discussion about little Sadie's eating and bowel movement schedule. Mercifully, Hannah came to the rescue.

"Now, Momma," she said with a twinkle in her eyes, "I'm sure these two lovelies want to get back to their evening. They've been generous enough with their time already."

Bella protested weakly out of politeness but was thrilled when Mrs. Cope's eyes widened as she nodded.

"Oh my heavens, you're absolutely right, my dear. You two move along now and have a nice night. We'll let you know how everything turns out with Sadie, but thanks to you, I'm sure she'll be fine."

After a final round of goodbyes, Edward and Bella walked out of the animal hospital and headed to his car. Bella eyed the backseat and was happy to see that most, if not all, of the blood had been contained by the towel.

"Where are your clothes? You didn't bring them out with you," Bella noted as she climbed into the passenger seat.

"I tossed them," he replied. "They were pretty much trashed. Luckily, Megan was able to scrounge up these old scrubs for me to use."

"Megan?"

"The vet tech that talked to us before we left. She went out of her way to be helpful."

"Yeah, I'll bet she did," Bella muttered under her breath.

"What was that?" Edward asked, looking over his shoulder as he backed out of the parking space.

"Nothing, never mind." Bella let out the quietest of sighs and willed herself to get over the prickle of jealousy she felt. Edward wasn't hers, she reminded herself.

One thing was certain, though. She wouldn't be sending helpful Miss Megan any fruit baskets.

"So, what's up with all the medical supplies?" Bella asked in an attempt to change the subject. "I thought doctors who still carried bags with them only existed in works of fiction."

Edward sheepishly ran a hand through his hair. "I was a little overenthusiastic about being a doctor when I started medical school. I had visions of stumbling on a horrific emergency and saving everyone's life with nothing but my mad skills and a suture kit. But in reality, until tonight, the only thing I've ever used from that stash was a Band-Aid...for myself."

"Nice," Bella laughed. "Though I guess it's good you've never needed it, right? And you did just save Sadie's life. It was nice of you to give me credit, too, but I didn't really do much at all."

"Oh, you did more than enough," Edward replied, his voice becoming heavy with worry and frustration. "You about gave me a heart attack when you went after that dog! What if it had turned on you instead?"

"Well I couldn't just sit there and do nothing!" Bella retorted. "I was closer to them than you were, and even then, I still didn't get to Sadie in time to keep her from getting bitten."

"I know, it's just…" Sighing, Edward switched hands on the steering wheel and reached over to take one of Bella's. "Even though we've only known each other for a few days, I really care about you. I can't stand the thought of you getting hurt." His fingers tightened around hers, adding emphasis to his words.

Bella just about melted into a puddle of happiness right where she sat. It had been a long time since a guy had made her feel so cherished and safe. Paul had always acted a little aloof, Mike smothered her with his jealous paranoia, and Jake, well…the one she'd believed was her safest harbor hurt her the most with his betrayal.

The thought of her first boyfriend caused her to stiffen—an action that Edward noticed right away. Slowly, reluctantly, he released her hand to pull his own back, but Bella held him in place.

"Thanks," she said, her voice wavering uncharacteristically. "That means a lot. I…I care about you, too."

Edward was facing forward, eyes on the road, but Bella could see relief wash over him. Eventually, the side of his mouth quirked up in an enigmatic smile, as if he knew a secret. It looked like a juicy one, and she wanted in on it.

"What?" she prodded.

"Hmm?"

"What are you over there grinning about?"

"Nothing…well, something," he amended, glancing at her from the corner of his eye. "I want to talk to you when we get back to your place."

"Talk? When we get back? About what? Why can't we talk now?" Bella felt like she would explode from curiosity. "Is this a bad talk or a good talk?"

"Good talk," Edward said with a small chuckle. "At least, I think it's good. I'm really hoping you feel the same way."

"Ah! How am I going to survive until then?" She bounced in her seat. "Okay, one thing you need to know about me: I'm ridiculously impatient. 'I want an Oompa Loompa _now_ ,' dammit!"

Edward smiled, amused. "Keep your pants on, Veruca. We're almost there."

Bella couldn't help herself with that easy opening. "Fine," she pouted. "I'll stay in my pants for now. But I make no promises about later on."

And that was all it took for Edward's mind to make a dive for the gutter. He spent the rest of drive struggling to keep away images of him slipping Bella's jeans down her shapely legs.

Bella was also silent. She couldn't imagine what Edward wanted to talk to her about. Something about the bet? Their friends? The date that she hoped hadn't yet concluded?

He reached for her again when they exited the car at her apartment. Bella marveled at how nice it felt to walk hand-in-hand. Nice, and natural. She wondered if he could possibly feel the same way she did.

But as they neared her door, that comfortable ease changed into something different. Excitement and anticipation grew; her body took on a charge like a live wire. She almost forgot her anxiety over The Talk in her eagerness to explore the pulsing ache lighting every one of her cells on fire.

Ever the gentleman, Edward complimented her apartment when they stepped through the door. She just nodded and pulled him over to her couch.

"Okay, we're here, we're sitting, so let's talk!" she sang out impatiently. "I want to hear the goodness you promised me."

Edward stared at her for a moment, taken aback by her abruptness. "Wow, I guess we're just jumping right into it, huh?" His hand went to his hair again. "Uh, give me a sec to get my thoughts together. I want to make sure I don't screw this up."

"Hey, you said this was a good talk. How would you screw that up?" Nervousness began to bubble in Bella's stomach. "Unless...unless you wanted to throw me off because you actually have something not-so-good to say. Oh, crap."

"No, it's not bad, I swear," Edward tried to reassure her. "I just have to—"

" _Oooh!_ It's the sex-logistics talk, isn't it? Yeah, I can see how it might be a little weird to jump right into that."

"What?" Edward choked back a surprised laugh. "That's not what I was going to…I mean we _should_ , but—"

"Hey, it's fine, I'll start," Bella interrupted with a grin. "Like I blurted out the first time we met, it's been over two years, almost three, since I've been with anyone. I was tested after that—all good there—and had a depo shot last month. So, as long as you're clean, it's up to you if you want a condom. Are you?"

He blinked at the rush of unexpected information. "Uh…am I what?"

"Clean—you know, free from STIs and all that nasty stuff. I'd imagine as a doctor you'd be careful about that sort of thing."

"Yeah, uh, I am...both careful and clean, that is. But if you'd just let me talk for a minute—"

"Noo..." Bella groaned and rubbed her thighs together. "How about we talk later? Please? I had an _amazing_ time with you tonight before all that crap happened with the dogs, and even then, when you took charge of the situation, it was _so damned_ hot, and now you're wearing those really thin scrubs that leave oh-so-little to the imagination, and I just want to _rip_ them off you and then—"

She didn't get a chance to say anything else; Edward's lips descending on hers not only stopped her words from coming, it also stopped her brain from working. Nothing existed outside of his warm, wet mouth and the incredible sensation of his firm body pressing against hers. A whimper formed deep in the back of her throat when his tongue pushed inside and stroked her own. She responded as best she could, but because her head was so addled by his delicious taste, she pretty much just lay back against the couch and enjoyed everything he was giving her.

The kiss went on for several glorious but much-too-short minutes. When Edward finally broke away, Bella was left in a breathless daze. He leaned against the couch beside her, his body angled in her direction. A self-satisfied smile stretched across his face.

"It worked," he commented, only slightly less winded than she. "I'll definitely have to keep that in mind for the future."

"Wh-what worked?" Bella was rather impressed with her ability to stutter out a few words given her current state.

"I figured I should bypass 'mute' and go straight for the 'off' button. Takes a little more finesse, but the results are worth it."

"You think you're so clever, huh?" Bella muttered. She grabbed a handful of his shirt material and gave it a weak tug in an effort to pull him back to her. "I've got news for you, buddy. I'm the opposite of turned off at the moment."

Edward gently removed her hand and brought it up to his mouth for a kiss. "Well, that's unfortunate, because I _am_ going to get my chance to talk now." He shook his head and chuckled. "Third time's the charm, I guess."

He watched, entertained, as she grunted and groaned her way into an upright position.

"Alright, you win. Let's hear it," she said, taking a breath and sounding a little more like her usual self. "I solemnly promise to keep my mouth shut this time." She mimed zipping her lips, locking them closed, and tucking the key into the shirt pocket of his scrubs.

Edward smiled and dropped another kiss onto the knuckles of her hand. "Thank you, my dear. I appreciate your cooperation, especially when I'm trying to tell you how crazy I am about you."

"Mmf?" Bella squeaked, her eyes going wide.

"I already mentioned that I haven't dated much," he continued, pretending not to have heard her shocked outburst. "Yes, it's true that school, studying, residency—all of that career-related stuff—had something to do with it, but that's not the biggest reason. Mostly, I just didn't like anyone enough to want to try. But with _you_ —well, it's only been a few days, and already I care about you more than any other woman I've met. Probably more than all of them combined. And that's a big deal to me. Like, really big. So that's why, despite how insanely attracted I am to you, I don't want us to have meaningless sex. I don't want this to be a one-night stand kind of thing that gets revealed to our friends years later in a drunken game of 'Never Have I Ever.' I want more than that."

"Mm mm mmm?"

Her face brimmed with hopeful emotion. Edward squeezed her hand tightly.

"Yes, I want more. I know I've gone on and on about being a doctor, but that's not all of who I am or who I can be—such as an equal partner in a successful relationship. It's not always going to be easy with my schedule—I won't lie about that—but if I'm not alone in my feelings about us, I really believe we can make it work."

He took a deep breath and squarely met her gaze.

"That's a lot to digest all at once, but do you have any, uh, initial thoughts you could share? How do you feel about what I said?"

He did his best not to squirm as Bella stared intensely at him for what felt like hours. She didn't blink even once. His hope deflating, he was just about to break the excruciating silence when Bella lurched forward. She buried her head in his chest and then shook it back and forth against his shirt.

"Mmm mm mmm! Mm mm mm-mmm mm!"

"What? What does that mean?" Edward asked nervously. He took hold of Bella's shoulders and eased her back so that he could see her face. The tears gathering in her eyes alarmed him.

"What's wrong? Are you upset? Come on, Bella, you can talk to me now!"

"Mm-mm," she responded adamantly. She patted the pocket on his chest, then stood up and crossed her arms.

"Oh, for the love of—" he groaned. "I swear, woman, you're lucky you're so damned adorable." Rolling his eyes in mock frustration, he pulled the pretend key out of his pocket and used it to open the lock on her mouth. "There," he said when he'd finished unzipping her lips. " _Now_ will you tell me what you think?"

"Yes, but you have to answer a few questions first." She swiped impatiently at the wetness in her eyes.

"Uh…okay?" Edward replied, puzzled.

"Are you a person who cheats?"

"What? No, of course not!" he exclaimed indignantly.

"Good." Bella nodded to herself in approval. "What about possessiveness and jealousy? Are you the kind of person who gets off on controlling other people and would need to know where I am and what I'm doing every minute of the day?"

"Um, that would be another 'no.' Why do you ask?"

"Eh, we'll talk about it later," she replied with a dismissive wave of her hand. "Just one last multi-part question. Do you buy or sell illegal drugs? Any gang connections, including but not limited to the mafia? Do you have any convictions of petty theft or higher? And finally, would you ever steal from me?"

"What in the—?" Edward barked out a laugh of disbelief. "Are you being serious right now?"

"Just answer the questions, Mister." Her face was perfectly sincere without a hint of humor.

"Uhh…okay. The answer to all of them is no. Well, except maybe the last one. I don't think I'd be able to resist stealing a kiss from time to time."

Bella's mouth didn't so much as twitch at his joke. She stared hard at him for a few seconds longer, then let out a high-pitched squeal and launched herself back into the lap of a startled Edward.

"Oh my god! I can't believe it!" she cried, peppering his face with kisses. "I feel _exactly_ the same way about you! Like there's this weirdly awesome and intense connection between us, and if I don't give it a shot at working, then I'll regret it forever. This is crazy!" She stopped and pulled back to look at him. "So we're doing this? The perpetual bachelor and the scorned man-hater are going to give it a go?

He smiled, his face softening into a tender expression. "Sounds about right to me. I think it'll be nice. Going out on dates, spending the night, saving the world one little dog at a time. We make a good team."

"Yup," Bella replied happily. She rested her forearms on his chest and tangled her fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck. "And I could definitely get used to this."

"Definitely," he agreed.

They leaned in for a kiss at the same time. It started out slowly, sweetly, as if they were signing a sacred agreement on delicate parchment.

But, with so much built-up sexual tension between the two, the kiss didn't stay sweet for long.

One moment their lips moved languidly against one another; the next, Bella was digging her fingernails in Edward's shoulders as his tongue plunged forcefully in and out of her mouth. His hands dropped down to her hips to drag her body over the hardness pushing up between her legs.

"Oh god, Bella," he groaned. "I want you so badly."

"Me, too." She slid her hand down his chest and took hold of his thick erection through the material of his scrubs. "You do realize that we don't have to worry about meaningless sex anymore, right?" she murmured breathlessly in his ear.

"R-right," he croaked as she began squeezing and tugging on his cock. "Do you wanna, uh…bedroom?"

"Later," she promised hungrily. "I can't wait another second to feel you inside me."

"Fuck yes," Edward hissed, his hips bucking up into her hand.

"Oh, the good doctor's got a dirty mouth on him." Bella moved backwards off his legs and reached for the button at her waist as her other hand continued to work him up and down. "I like it."

She started to wiggle out of her jeans, but Edward stopped her.

"No, let me," he implored. "I've been imagining this moment ever since you made that comment about not staying in your pants."

Leaning forward, he slid the material over her hips and pressed wet kisses on the exposed skin. Bella shivered as he made his way down her legs.

"Please," she begged. "Remember how I said I was an impatient person? That wasn't a lie. We can take our time all night long if you want…I just need you _now_."

"You do, huh?" Edward murmured against the inside of her thigh. "I guess…if you insist…"

In a single smooth motion, he yanked down her underwear with one hand while freeing his cock with the other. Before Bella could fully understand what was happening, he'd pulled her in his lap and thrust up inside her.

" _Oh my holy fffu—!"_ she cried out upon registering the sensation of absolute fullness. She could practically feel his dick pressing against her throat, and good lord, it was _amazing_. She'd been so wet that he had slid in with minimal resistance considering how long it had been. There was some stretching and accommodating, to be sure, but it wasn't uncomfortable. In fact, sex had never felt so good.

And they hadn't even started moving yet.

Edward very much wanted to rectify that situation but was afraid it would be all over for him if he did. Bella was just so damned _tight_ around him. Tight, wet, and warm. He was suddenly glad that they hadn't taken the time to undress fully. No question about it, he would have come apart if he'd had to contend with the sight of her naked breasts along with everything else.

Hoping to give himself a little time to settle down, he slid his hand between them and found her clit. Bella gasped as his fingertip moved in small, precise circles over her.

"Oh hell, I've gone and hit the sex jackpot!" she panted. "I said yes to dating a surgeon and his magical fingers. Best decision ever!"

Edward's responding bark of laughter was cut short when she swiveled her hips forward into his hand. His dick moved inside her, and the friction was…indescribable. A pained groan gurgled in his throat as he tried to keep hold of his rapidly departing senses.

"You said…you said we could go slow…later…right?" he managed to grit out through a clenched jaw.

Bella seemed to be having her own difficulties in speaking. "Yes…fuck…yes…slow later…hard… _oh god, you're so hard_ …now…"

"Okay, just…hold on tight…"

Grabbing onto her hips, Edward flipped the two of them over so that she lay under him on the couch. His height made it a difficult fit, but he was far too desperate to be deterred by such a trivial detail. With his arms braced against the arm and the back of the couch, he rammed his cock into Bella again and again.

Wanting everything he gave her and more, she wrapped her legs around his thighs and positioned herself so that he hit all the right spots. It didn't longer than a minute before her back was arching and her toes were curling in anticipation.

"Yes, yes, yes…right there…fuck, I'm gonna…oh god, _I'm coming_!" she cried out, pushing herself up hard into him.

Edward didn't need any more encouragement than that. With a yell of his own, he let go his tentative hold on control and exploded deep within her. Bella jerked and shuddered as each heavy pulse of his cock triggered yet another wave of intense pleasure.

Both of their minds were blissfully blank when their bodies finally stilled. Edward used the last of his remaining strength to roll them down to the floor where he could easily stretch out and she could relax on top of him.

They tangled their legs together, closed their eyes, and simply existed for a while.

...

Eventually, Bella regained the use of speech, albeit in a limited fashion.

"Wow."

...

Edward responded a minute later.

"Yeah. Wow."

...

Three minutes after that:

"I'm dripping on you."

"Mm-hmm."

...

Another two minutes passed.

"I should probably do something about that."

"Okay."

...

A short stretch of silence.

"Or I could keep lying here. Moving sucks."

"It does."

Edward slid his hands under her shirt and caressed the dip of her lower back. Bella hummed in contentment.

...

Several more minutes crept by.

This time, he spoke first.

"So, it's probably too early to start thinking about love, huh?"

"Hmm, probably," Bella replied, yawning. "We need to try some of that slow sex first, and then see how we feel after waking up in the same bed. Really bad morning breath could be a deal-breaker."

"So…tomorrow then?"

"Sure. I think I can see myself being hopelessly in love with you by tomorrow."

Edward nodded sleepily and kissed the top of her head.

"Bed now?"

"Sounds like a plan."

...

* * *

 **Oh for eff's sake.**

 **7200-odd words, and I'm _still_ not to the morning after scene. I decided to break it off here because I pledged on FB it would up Sunday, and...it wasn't. I blame the god-awful heat and the newborn miniature mule that unexpectedly popped out of my pony last week. Talk about a surprise! Turns out baby equines are nearly as much work as baby people for the first few days, especially when one is caught unprepared. :)**

 **ps-Pictures and videos of said baby boy mini mule are on my FB page under my FF name Rachel Winterhorses. :D**


	5. Chapter 5

**Personalities in Disorder - Outtake Part 4**

 **The Next Morning** _(Takes place immediately after Chapter 1)_

* * *

The pounding on the door came at 7:23 a.m. Bella groaned and pulled the pillow over her head.

"What the hell is that?" she rasped. "You have some rude-ass neighbors."

"Not mine," Edward yawned, his voice heavy with sleep. "We're at your place."

"Again?" It took a few moments for her brain to wake up and kick into gear. "Oh, right. We 'met' for the first time at the club last night." She took note of her throbbing head and winced. "That explains the hangover."

More dull thuds could be heard through the open bedroom door.

"So, you ready for the big reveal?" Edward asked, rubbing his eyes and stretching.

"I changed my mind," Bella grumbled. "This was a terrible idea."

"We could always ignore them. They're bound to give up at some point. Either that, or someone will call the police."

"Remember, this is Alice. She'd probably call them herself. Then Rose would sweet-talk them into breaking down the door."

"Or just have Emmett do it."

"Good point. Dammit."

Edward slid his arm under Bella's shoulders to pull her against his body. "We don't have to tell them right this minute. You can go play up your hangover to Alice." He shifted and nudged his morning erection into her thigh. "I'll stay hidden in here…and keep the bed warm until you hurry back."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" she chuckled, pushing back against the tempting hardness. For a moment, she got lost in the feeling of its solid yet silky smoothness dragging across her skin. Then she sighed. "But again…Alice. You think a simple hangover would stop her? Hell, my casket could be getting lowered into the ground, and she'd still pry the top off to question my corpse."

As if to prove her point, a muffled voice began to accompany the pounding.

"Wake your drunken ass up, hoochie-mama! You got some 'splaining to do!"

"Ugh, I'd better go." Muttering obscenities under her breath, Bella rolled out of bed and threw a wrinkled satin robe around her frame. "See you in a few."

Alice didn't let up on the banging, even when Bella called out that she was on her way. The only thing that saved the petite, dark-haired girl from a smack on the tits was the large cup of coffee she thrust in Bella's hands as she swept into the apartment. Rosalie, looking glamorous despite the ungodly hour, tugged a disheveled Emmett inside behind her.

"I tried to stop her," Rosalie declared archly, settling herself in a chair. "But you know how she is."

"What _I'd_ like to know is what I'm doing here," Emmett muttered. "I'm sure you two are perfectly capable of annoying the hell out of Bella on your own."

"But she was acting so strange last night," Rosalie said, her voice syrupy-sweet and angelic. "What if she'd called up some random guy after we left and needed help getting rid of him? I felt _so_ much safer having you come along."

Emmett gawked at his girlfriend. "Seriously, babe? _That's_ what you're gonna go with?"

Rose pouted for a moment and then shrugged. "Eh," she replied, giving up on the pretense.

"Whatever, McCarty, you're already here, that ship has sailed," Alice chimed in impatiently. "Besides, I want you to hear Bella's explanation firsthand. You need to see this girl in all her bitter, awkward, _normal_ glory so that you know that I wasn't cheating."

"'Bitter, awkward glory'?" Bello echoed, frowning. "What the hell's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh, can it, sister," Alice retorted. "You know exactly what I mean. Tell us why you were little Miss Sluts 'R Us last night instead of your usual flannel-clad self."

Bella affected a wounded expression. "You thought I looked like a slut? I just tried to pick something I thought _you_ might wear."

"Exactly!" Alice exploded. "I dress like a raging whore when I go out. I want guys to think I'm easy and hit on me so that I feel good about myself. But you don't care about that sort of thing! You haven't given a rat's ass about your appearance for years. What gives?"

Rosalie shook her head sadly and made a tsking sound. "The feminist movement would be ashamed of you, Mary Alice Brandon. So ashamed."

"Shut your face, woman. At least I own up to my need for constant attention, unlike _some_ people I know."

"Ex _cuse_ me?" Rosalie growled, standing up from her seat. "You'd better not be talking about me, because if you are…"

"Ladies, ladies, knock it off," Bella commanded. She pushed Rosalie back into the chair. "If you're going to throw down, take it outside. And let me go back to bed. You know, where normal people are on a Saturday morning at this hour."

"Preach, sister," Emmett muttered, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back against the couch.

Alice huffed and turned back to Bella. "Fine, we'll behave, but only because you haven't given me answers yet."

The brunette rolled her eyes and plopped down onto the couch beside Emmett. "I already told you. It was past time for Bella to Get her Groove Back. I'm trying to loosen up and live a little."

With crossed arms and a furrowed brow, Alice studied her friend's face, heavy skepticism on her own. "So," she said after a silent minute, "When exactly did you have this giant epiphany of yours? Were you in the middle of getting dressed last night, and _poof!_ —your bitchy attitude towards men up and left the building?" Her expression turned accusing. "Because if all this happened before then, you certainly never mentioned anything about it to _me_ , one of your bestest friends in the whole wide world."

"It was, um, something of a process," Bella replied, doing her best to sound guilty while fighting to hide a smile. "Remember when I changed my mind about meeting the guys at a club instead of doing dinner at my house? I figured, why not just jump in headfirst and go for broke with hair, makeup, a new outfit—the works."

Alice's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Yeah, about that. I'm sure you and Rose understand that you're not gonna get away with not inviting me to this little makeover party of yours. You're just lucky you pulled it off so spectacularly, or I'd have to cut a bitch or two."

"As if there was any doubt with me involved," Rosalie sniffed, examining one of her perfectly-manicured nails.

"Hey now," Bella jumped in before another catfight could break out. She shot Rosalie a sidelong glare before turning large, innocent eyes to Alice. "Why should _how_ I finally saw the light matter over the fact that I _did_? I mean, you've been busting my balls for a long time. Isn't this what you wanted?"

Alice uttered a series of low, incoherent grumblings before allowing herself to concede the fact. "Yeah, yeah, of course." Then her nose wrinkled in annoyance. "Timing could've been a little better though," she added under her breath.

Emmett heard what she'd said and snorted. "Yeah, no shit about the timing problem. I've been waiting years to see Edward lose it over a chick, and when he finally does, it somehow bites me in the ass. I'm telling you, if he hadn't been acting like such an idiot last night, I _know_ I would've won, dammit."

Hissing angrily, Alice made rather indiscrete slashing motions across her throat. Emmett's eyes widened when he realized what he'd said, but it was too late to take back the words.

Rosalie was careful not to look in Bella's direction, instead staring off to the side. "Hmm," she mused, tapping her chin with a finger as if in deep thought. "The timing was such an unfortunate _coincidence_ for all involved."

"What's an unfortunate coincidence?" Bella demanded, playing her part. She eyed Alice and Emmett. "What are you two talking about with timing and Edward and winning?"

"Nothing, nothing," Alice jumped in quickly. "It's really not important…at all…with the timing...and the winning...and..."

She trailed off as realization began to set in.

"Wait a minute. You just happened to have a bizarre personality flip…at the _exact_ same time Edward did…"

Emmett saw where she was going. "And because of that, no one won the bet…"

His head whipped toward Rosalie.

"You told her!"

Alice's jaw dropped when she gasped. Her expression of surprise was so funny that Bella and Rosalie's smug grins gave way to bursts of laughter.

The small dark-haired woman didn't find this amusing in the least.

"You…you…bet-wrecking cheater!" she sputtered. "I can't believe you ratted us out! When did you…? How long has she…? Why didn't we…? ARGH, how _could_ you?"

While Alice attempted to shoot flames at Rosalie from her eyes, Emmett was shaking his head and chuckling.

"Damn, we got owned." He smirked at his girlfriend and patted his lap. "C'mere, babe. You deserve congrats for that nice piece of double-crossing."

Rosalie sauntered grandly to the couch and allowed him to pull her down into his lap. Emmett wasted no time kissing her with gusto.

"By the way, I'd like to make a point of clarification," she said when they finally parted. "I didn't double-cross anyone. If you'll recall, I said from the beginning that I wanted nothing to do with your ridiculous bet."

"Yeah, maybe, but that didn't give you the right to blab about it," Alice huffed. "It was pretty crappy of you."

"Huh. You know what else was crappy?" Bella growled out, glaring across the room. "The fact that you made a bet about me in the first place—especially one like that. The reason behind it is both offensive and hurtful." She shook her head in dismay. "And while we're on the subject, I'm really getting tired of you judging my life and trying to screw around with it. Why is it so hard for you to accept me the way I am?"

"What?—no!" Alice cried. "That's not why—of course I accept you! It's just that…" Her voice weakened to a murmur as tears welled in her eyes. "All I want is for you to be happy. Ever since Jake, you've closed yourself off more and more, and sometimes I feel as if you're pulling away from me and Rose, too. Even when you smile and have fun, it seems like you're holding back. I know I've been pushy and acting a little like—okay, a lot like—a pain in the ass, but I keep hoping that maybe one of these times you'll have a good experience and start to trust people again."

"How do you explain the bet, then?" Bella asked coolly, raising an eyebrow.

"Stupidity," Alice sighed. "I was frustrated and kind of mad after you hung up on me last week when I tried to set you up on a date." She glanced at Rosalie and then back to Bella. "I'm sure you know the details of how this all went down, but it pretty much comes back to me being stupid. I got so caught up in the idea of winning that I didn't think about how you might feel. It was wrong, and I'm so, _so_ sorry."

"Yeah, me too, Bella," Emmett chimed in. "And I'm also sorry that I caused us to start out on the wrong foot. I think you're pretty awesome and hope that you'll give me the chance to redeem myself."

Bella considered them both for a long moment before nodding. "Alright, apologies accepted. The two of you were big fat douches for making the bet, and I glad you finally realize it." She turned to Alice. "I also get that your annoying-as-hell nagging actually comes from a good place in your heart. That part, I appreciate. But the more you get on my case, the more I want to dig in my heels. Yeah, I got burned pretty badly by my exes. And maybe it was taking me a while to move past it, but you can't push me into things before I'm ready. It's my life; it'll happen on my timeline. I've told you this over and over, and I hope it finally sinks in for once."

Two lines of tears spilled down Alice's cheek as she nodded frantically. "I swear, I'm not going to say another word about it. No more blind dates, no more nagging, and definitely no more bets. Pushy Alice is a thing of the past."

Bella laughed. "Whoa, be careful. I think you might've gone too far on that last one. Let's try to be realistic, here."

"Yeah, you're probably right about that," Alice giggled shakily. She sniffled and dabbed at her eyes with her sleeve. "So, are we…okay?"

"We're okay," Bella confirmed, opening her arms so that Alice could run into them. She squeezed her best friend tightly.

Emmett watched them embrace, then got up and wrapped his arms around them both. "Group hug!" he announced, lifting them a few inches off the ground.

Laughing at the unexpected gesture, Alice and Bella immediately started swatting at his chest and shoulders for him to let go. Rosalie snorted in amusement when he dropped them on the couch in a tangle of body parts.

"Personally, I think she's letting you off easy," the blonde said to Alice and Emmett. "But I suppose your epic freakouts last night were worth something in terms of payback."

"Seriously!" Alice exclaimed. "We had no idea what was going on. I'm dying to know the story behind it!"

Savoring their moment of victory, Bella and Rosalie related the meeting at the bar and how the three conspirators had planned to spoil the bet. Rosalie was modest about her role in coming up with the scheme and gave most of the credit to Bella and Edward's acting skills.

"I have to be honest, I was a little worried that they wouldn't be able to pull off what I had in mind, but the whole night turned out even better than I imagined." She looked at Bella with admiration in her eyes. "Were you in drama club in high school or something? I mean, the way you and Edward played off each so perfectly, like a well-rehearsed scene…and you'd barely spent an hour with him up to that point. Amazing."

Bella raised a hand to her mouth to cover a sly smile. "Thanks, Rose. You know, Emmett was right. Edward was really easy to work with; I guess he _does_ have a way with people. Maybe Alice would've lost the bet if you hadn't spilled the beans."

"Ha, I knew it!" Emmett cheered, pumping his fist. "The Chick Whisperer strikes again!"

"Oh please," Alice scoffed. "I'll grant you that he's a rather impressive specimen of maleness, but you don't know the depth of Bella's man-hate. Ask Rosalie if you don't believe me. Hell, ask Bella herself. We didn't call her the Ice Queen for nothing."

The brunette in question shrugged. "It's true. I did hold a massive grudge against men after being screwed over so many times. Yeah, I think it's fair to say I was a frigid bitch on more than one occasion."

"Huh, could've fooled me. You certainly weren't like that last night. In fact, I think you were pretty damned hot."

Three of the four heads in the living room snapped toward the hallway, where a male figure clad in boxers and a white undershirt was stepping out of the bedroom. The mouths on those three heads gaped open in utter shock as the implications set in. And three pairs of eyes stared unblinking when the man sauntered across the room and lowered himself on the couch beside Bella.

There was another set of eyes staring, as well, but in a very different manner. They were sparkling brown and alight with desire. Happiness resided there, too—a happiness that glowed with laughter when she was scooped up by strong arms and deposited in a welcoming lap.

"Now that I'm more awake, I can give you a proper 'good morning,'" she told him just before attaching her hungry lips to his.

Everything else in the room fell away except for the movement of his mouth, the feel of his firm body against hers, and the subtly enticing scent of yesterday's aftershave. Humming her appreciation of his nearness, Bella ran her fingertips over the light stubble on his jaw and let her hands continue back to tangle in his messy hair.

"Um, dearest?" Edward groaned, half-heartedly attempting to slow his kisses. "I think we're close to crossing the 'proper' line when it comes to company."

"Eh, screw them," Bella mumbled against his lips. "It's way too early for company, anyway. They deserve whatever they get."

Edward's weak reply was swallowed by a renewed attack on his mouth, and he was quite okay with that. The passionate kiss continued on, interrupted only when she grabbed the hem of his tee shirt and began tugging upward.

"Hey! Easy over there!" Emmett choked out, at last finding his voice. "We don't need to see any of that."

"Shh!" Alice hissed. "A miracle is happening before our eyes. One doesn't try to stop miracles. What kind of person are you?"

Both Bella and Edward laughed at the sheer incredulity in Alice's tone. Bella planted another, more playful kiss on her lover's lips and then swiveled on his lap to face their stunned audience. Edward bit back a whimper of need as she knowingly rubbed over his growing erection in the process.

"You're evil," he muttered in her ear.

She just grinned and waited for the chaos to ensue.

It didn't take long, and came in the form of their three friends all trying to talk at once.

Emmett seemed to be having a hard time believing the scene in front of him. "How did you—? Where did he—? What the hell is going on? You didn't pay any attention to him last night, and I put you to bed…alone. And now he's here…and you're all over each other?"

Alice, for her part, didn't care about the backstory. "No, don't stop!" she cried, jumping off the couch and grabbing Rosalie's hand. "We'll leave…we're going right now! Don't mind us; you two just keep right at it!"

Rosalie barely noticed the insistent pulling on her arm. She was too busy shaking her head in awe.

"I did _not_ see this coming. Sure, I'd hoped, but the way they pulled it off…wow. Nicely done. The student has now become the master."

"Wait. Are you saying you're surprised about this?" Emmett asked Rosalie. He turned to Edward and Bella before his girlfriend could answer. "Did you two know each other before Rose had you meet her at Antonio's?"

"Nope," Bella answered, drawing lazy circles on Edward's knee. "He asked me out after she 'conveniently' ran off on us. We had our first date last Thursday. And, other than a rather intense incident involving my neighbor's dog, it went really well."

"Yeah, I'll say," Emmett snorted. "It went well enough for you to become fuck buddies after one week. Damn, Edward. I'm not sure whether to slap you five or slap you upside the head. I promised the girls you weren't skeevy."

"Oh, my god, would you just stop talking?" Alice fumed, throwing her arms in the air. "Who cares what they're doing or how fast it's moving? Did you see the way she smiled? I swear, Emmett Whatever-The-Hell-Your-Middle-Name-Is McCarty, if you do _anything_ to mess this up…"

"Now wait just a minute," Edward jumped in. "Let's back up here. Bella and I are _not_ 'fuck buddies,' as you so eloquently put it." He tightened his arms around the woman on his lap and kissed her temple. "I love her."

"And I love him," Bella replied, turning to face him. Her expression was full of the very emotion she had just declared.

"You... _what?_ " Emmett gasped. His mouth opened and closed soundlessly as if further speech confounded him.

Rosalie looked just as shocked by the announcement. Alice, however, squealed with glee and bounced back to her spot on the couch beside the new couple, who was sharing yet another heated kiss.

"This is so great! _Ack_! I'm so freaking happy right now," she gushed. "Oh, I know! Let's set up a triple date! How about tonight? Dinner at my place?"

"Calm down, Ali," Rose instructed. She eyed Edward warily. "Look, I don't want to be a downer and burst the happy bubble you've got going, but isn't it a little, um… _soon_ for both of you? And out of character, too? Heck, just two weeks ago, Bella was bitching to Alice about slobbering male gorillas and how men couldn't be trusted farther than you could kick them."

Emmett nodded. "Yeah, and Edward told me he didn't want any kind of relationship to stand in the way of his career. And now all of the sudden he's doing a one-eighty and jumping headfirst into love?" His eyes narrowed slightly at his best friend. "This isn't another trick, is it?"

"Not in the least," Edward avowed. "And if you think about it, I was being sincere last night, too. Well, mostly sincere." He smirked. "Though Bella totally owns me, I'd like to think I've still got a little of my charm."

"Oh, you definitely do," Bella confirmed with a chuckle. "Even when you acted like a huge dork on purpose, I still wanted to jump your bones." She slid a provocative finger down the side of Edward's neck and traced his collar bones.

"Okay, lust and attraction I get," Emmett said quickly before another make-out session could occur. "But serious love after a week?"

"Hey, you said you knew right away with Rosalie," Edward retorted, indignant. "Why is _that_ legit, but me falling for Bella isn't?"

"Because I'm Emmett, and you're Edward. I go with my gut, do crazy impulsive shit, take risks." He pointed an accusing finger across the room. " _You_ , on the other hand…you have a plan for everything—one that you stick to. Take being a doctor. You've known forever that it's your purpose in life. Pretty much all your decisions since then have been carefully thought out so they support your goal. And now you're trying to tell me you're ready to be in a serious relationship just like that?" He snapped his fingers for emphasis. "No analyzing the idea to death? No testing it out first through casual dating before slowly making up your mind? Sorry, but it's not like you at all, and although I'm just getting to know Bella, I don't want to see her hurt."

Edward's face reddened in a burst of anger. "What the hell, Emmett? I'm not going to hurt her. Not now, not _ever_." He blew out a frustrated breath. "So what if I'm not usually impulsive? There's no reason I can't be. You should know better than anyone that a decision can be right even if it's spontaneous. But, whatever, all this is irrelevant anyway. I'm not making a conscious decision to love Bella; I just _do_. And that should be good enough for you. If it isn't, well, that's your problem."

His sincerity was plain to see, and Emmett raised his hands in a placating manner.

"Alright, alright. I hear ya. If that's the way you really feel, then I'm happy for y—"

But Edward appeared too riled up to listen to the other man's apology. "Some friend he is, thinking I'm not ready for a serious relationship…asshole," he muttered angrily. "I'm dead serious about me and Bella. I don't need 'casual dating' to figure out what I already know. And what's all this shit about me not being impulsive? Fuck it; I'll show him impulsive…"

He lifted Bella off his lap and set her back down on the couch.

"Be right back, sweetheart," he promised, giving her a hasty peck on her lips. Then he hurried into her bedroom without a word of explanation.

The remaining four people in the room stared after him.

"Huh, that was weird," Bella commented.

"Weird doesn't even begin to cover this—all of it," Rosalie said quietly. She studied Bella with discerning eyes. "You know I support you—hell, from the very beginning, I was hoping you and Edward would get along—but can you see why we're a little worried? It's taken you so long after Paul to get to this point, and for you to jump in so fast and so deep, well…I'm just afraid what'll happen if things don't work out this time."

Bella stood up and crossed the room to give her friend a heartfelt hug. "I know, but it's okay, I promise. The way I feel about Edward—it's so different than those other guys. With Mike and Paul, I think I was looking for a way to get over Jake and prove that I wasn't unlovable. Of course, those are terrible reasons to be in any relationship, and it didn't help that they were all first-class jerks. After them, I needed time to find myself, to get back my self-confidence."

"But with Edward?" Alice prodded eagerly.

Bella's whole expression lit up so brightly that everyone in the room felt compelled to smile along with her.

"With Edward, everything's the opposite. Instead of trying to force a connection, I attempted to deny one that was there from the beginning. Trust me, I had the same doubts you guys do, and then some, but it was impossible to ignore my feelings. And luckily, I realized that doing that was both stupid and futile. As soon as I stopped fighting it, everything made sense; everything felt _right_. So tell me, why in the world would I want to go against that?"

"You wouldn't," Rosalie murmured, her voice breaking.

"You shouldn't," Emmett agreed, sounding a little choked up himself.

"And I really hope you never do."

Edward had been standing against the hallway wall, observing the last minute of conversation. When he stepped back into the living room, Bella wasn't sure whether to laugh or to gasp.

She did both.

Both Emmett and Rosalie's brows wrinkled in confusion, but Alice figured it out right away. She made a number of high-pitched squeaking noises and performed an overenthusiastic happy dance on the couch.

Edward was still wearing boxers and a white tee, but he had donned black socks, his black Oxford shoes, and a haphazardly knotted blue silk tie that hung loosely around his neck. One of his hands was hidden behind his back.

"Sorry about the clothes," he said sheepishly, "but I left my bag in the car last night, and what I wore yesterday is a little, um, dirty. This is the best I could do."

Grinning like a fool, Bella nodded her understanding. She hadn't paid much attention to where Edward had flung her black dress when they attacked each other's bodies, but she doubted it was in much better shape.

"Um, E, my man?" Emmett asked rather tentatively. "W-T-F is up with the costume? Are you writing yourself illegal prescriptions again?"

Edward extended the middle finger of his free hand, not even bothering to glance his friend's way as he did so. "Shut your trap, Emmett," he said in a cheery tone. "Don't annoy me while I'm being spontaneous."

He came to a stop in front of Bella and gave her a lop-sided smile. "Well, mostly spontaneous," he amended, bringing his hidden hand in front of him to reveal a jewelry box. "Obviously, a measure of forethought went into this."

Emmett's eyes practically bugged out of his head. "Is that what I think it is? Holy—"

"Shh!" Alice hissed, jabbing him hard in the ribs. "One more word out of you, and I'll rip your testicles off and teach you a new meaning for the term 'ball gag.'"

Bella was completely oblivious to the peanut gallery, especially when Edward got down on one knee. He took hold of Bella's hand and brushed a kiss across the inside of her wrist.

"What you said earlier about everything feeling right when we're together? That's exactly how it is for me, too," Edward murmured, gazing at her with all adoration in his being. "I can honestly say that the days since I met you have been the best of my life. You're all that I never knew I needed but now can't imagine living without. Maybe it hasn't been long by conventional standards, but I love you, Isabella Marie Swan, and that's not going to change. Not next month, not next year, not decades from now. That feeling is as natural to me as my own name, and that's why I have no hesitation at the thought of being with you forever. We don't have to get married soon—hell, we don't have to get married at all if that's your preference—but I want you to know that my commitment to you is unbreakable and unconditional."

"Edward…" she whispered happily, the tears welling in her eyes. She squeezed his hand tightly.

He kissed her knuckles this time and then let go of her hand so that he could remove the three-stone diamond ring from its velvet casing.

"I'm yours," he said, his voice trembling slightly. "Will you accept this ring and be mine?"

Bella stood there for a moment, beaming and shaking her head in awe. "Wow," she breathed. "That wasn't what we…and it was just so…how am I supposed to…oh, _Edward_ …I-I don't even know what to say…"

"Um, how about 'yes'?" he suggested with a tender, hopeful smile.

Her expression becoming solemn, she stared down intently into his eyes, questioning, searching...understanding. She broke the eagerly impatient silence of the room with a soft yet unhesitant reply.

"Yes."

For the briefest second, stillness prevailed as each person reveled in the joy of the occasion.

Then the second was over.

Alice screamed.

Emmett whooped.

Even Rosalie let out a happy squeal.

Edward slipped the ring on Bella's finger, got to his feet, and kissed her fiercely.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," Alice shrilled as she jumped up and down. "I can't believe it! Bella's engaged! She's going to get married, and I'm going to plan her wedding! This is _so_ exciting! And—oh! I've got it already. We could do a winter theme. Not much time to pull it together—save the date cards need to go out next week—but I know I can do it. Royal blue and silver would be so gorgeous…"

Rosalie rolled her eyes at Alice's rabid rambling and waited for Bella to cut her off. But the directive never came. One look at the practically conjoined couple told her why.

"Ahem, Alice." Rosalie clamped a hand over her friend's mouth to stop the breathless chatter. "Remember that promise about not being so pushy? Anyway, I think we should probably hold onto the wedding talk until later, seeing as how your main participants aren't paying a damned bit of attention right now."

Alice's brows raised halfway up her forehead when she honed in on the sight before her.

"Wow, look at them go," she mumbled through Rosalie's fingers, her eyes wide.

Emmett, however, wanted nothing to do with that particular suggestion. Fidgeting in place, he cleared his throat.

"Um, not to be a perv or anything, but is it getting a little hot in here?" He gave his girlfriend a significant glance and nodded his head toward the front door.

"Uh, yes. Yes, it is," the blonde said with a smirk. She walked over to Emmett and grabbed his wrist. "Well, kiddos, I'm sure you want to be alone right now to…celebrate," she told the oblivious couple. "So, congrats and all that jizz...er, jazz. Alice and I will catch up with you soon to grill you over every single detail of your no-longer-secret love affair."

Bella's only reply was to moan into Edward's mouth and slide her hands under his tee shirt.

"Well, then," Alice said, fanning herself. "I'm gonna go see what's, er, _up_ with Jasper…bye Bella, bye Edward! Congrats!" She quickly trotted to the door, where Rosalie and Emmett were already waiting.

The latter allowed the ladies to step into the hallway first and then grabbed the door handle.

"Good going, Big E," he called out as he pulled the door shut. "Same to you, Little B."

Surprisingly, it was the rather quiet click of the door latch sliding home that caught Bella's attention. She disentangled her tongue from Edward's and looked around at the empty living room.

Something wasn't quite right, but she wasn't sure what that something was, at first.

It then occurred to her that, having gotten caught up in the taste and feel of one another, she and Edward had neglected to do a very important thing.

Startled by the abrupt disappearance of her lips, Edward jerked back to see what the problem was. When he noticed her eyes moving over the room, he surveyed the scene, too.

"Whoa. Where'd everyone go? Did they leave and we totally missed it?"

"That does seem to be the case," Bella replied, frowning.

"Oh." He ran a hand along his jaw. "Oops."

"Yeah. You could say that." Still a little winded from their intense make-out session, she took a deep breath and tried to collect her scattered wits. "This is…not good."

"Uhh…" Edward was also trying to work his way back to rationality. "Okay, let's think about this. So we didn't tell them it was a joke right away...no big deal, right? We'll have them over for dinner tonight and fess up."

"Sure. Except by then, Alice will have lined up three cake tastings and reserved a four-tiered chocolate fountain," Bella muttered, flopping down on the couch. "Damn. I hope you realize this is all on you. You and your multitalented tongue. First you addle my brain with a swoon-worthy proposal, then you short-circuit the rest of me with your practically criminal kissing ability."

"Yeah, well, you're no better," Edward huffed, falling down beside her. "How am I supposed to control what my mouth does when you lock onto me with those big, beautiful brown eyes? I swear, they're like tractor beams of lust or something."

"Tractor beams of…wha?" Bella gave him a strange look before letting her head tip back against the couch. "Anyway, we need to fix this asap. I'm starting to think Payback Part Two wasn't such a good idea."

"We might have gone just a _teensy_ bit overboard," he allowed, taking her hand.

"They're never going to trust us again after this. I think we come off looking worse now because of how suspicious they were about us being together so fast."

"Or being together at all," Edward grumbled. "What's up with that? And, come on, our story isn't _that_ crazy. Even if we'd gotten engaged for real, it's been over a week. Some people meet in Vegas for dinner and get married after dessert."

Bella laughed. "Yeah, sure. People in _movies_ , maybe. Name me one couple you know who's done that."

"Well, I don't have any actual examples, but I'm sure it's happened plenty of times," he sniffed in mock offense.

"I'm sure it has, dear," Bella replied graciously, patting his hand.

Chuckling at their playful banter, Edward slid his arm around Bella's shoulders and curled her into his side.

"I love you," he breathed as he kissed the top of her head.

They snuggled together contentedly on the couch for several quiet minutes, enjoying the closeness and letting their thoughts wander. Bella absently twirled Edward's ring around her finger and admired its fiery sparkles.

"I'm so clueless when it comes to jewelry," she murmured, mostly to herself. "Cubic zirconia, crystal, diamonds—it all looks the same to me." She held her hand out from her body to see the ring from a different perspective. "You did a really good job with this. I think if I were going to pick out a real one of these for myself, I'd go for something very similar. Where'd you get it? A department store? Or maybe one of those kiosks in the middle of malls?" She poked him in the chest. "You better not have spent more than fifty bucks, or I'll spank you."

"Is that a promise?" Edward said, waggling his eyebrows theatrically.

"Oh, so he has a kinky side, too. Nice."

"Just for you, baby."

Bella let out long sigh of happiness. She didn't know how she had gotten so lucky to have come across a man like Edward, but she wasn't about to complain. They fit together so naturally, so perfectly; even their differences were well-balanced. Not a single doubt about their relationship existed in her mind. In fact, if he had truly proposed earlier instead of merely acting out their mischievous scheme, she would've said yes.

To him, she would always say yes.

As her fingers explored the flat planes of his stomach, a ray of morning sun caught the ring and caused a rainbow of sparkles to appear on the white material of his shirt. She tilted her hand back and forth to make the colorful specks dance.

"You never did tell me where you picked this up," she noted lazily. Her comfy bed was beckoning, but it seemed like such an effort to drag her tired body all the way to her bedroom.

"Hmm?" Edward sounded half-asleep himself.

"Your fake engagement ring. It's so pretty. I almost hate to take it off."

"Oh, that? Found it at the bottom of a Cracker Jack box," he mumbled into her hair.

"Wow, you're so full of it this morning," Bella chuckled. "Now I'm really curious. Are you hiding something? I don't know the going rate for faux jewelry. I promise I won't be _too_ upset if it cost more than fifty dollars. Just tell me."

"Eh, it might have been a little over that. I don't know the exact price. You know us guys. We're terrible about remembering stuff like dates and numbers and store names." He yawned and stretched. "Are we passing out here or going back to the bed? If I don't move now, it's not gonna happen at all."

Shrugging her indifference at either choice, she continued to stare at the mesmerizing splash of color across his chest as it rose and fell with his rhythmic breathing.

Several more quiet minutes passed. Edward had just about nodded off when Bella spoke again.

"Edward?"

"Mm?"

"About this ring…"

"Yeah?"

"It's real, isn't it."

He shifted and tightened his arm around her but didn't say anything.

"And your proposal…that was real, too?"

His hands gripped her waist and pulled her onto his lap. He looked at her with bright green eyes that were no longer tired.

She could see the answer, burning in their emerald depths, clear as the moon on a cloudless night.

"You want to know something?" Her voice was low, intense, full of promise.

"Always."

Bella leaned forward to press a soft, lingering kiss against his lips.

"My answer…" she said quietly. "It was real, too."

Edward glanced down at her hands on his chest and slowly ran a fingertip over the ring. When his eyes met hers again, she could see an extra glimmer of light in them from moisture that hadn't been there before.

"I know," he replied. "I know."

The kiss that followed was both a beginning and a homecoming. Bella wasn't surprised, but it still amazed her that a love so new could feel so timeless and certain. Grateful for such a gift, she would be sure never to take it for granted.

"So, now we have a decision to make," she said after they finally parted. She laid her head on his chest, over his heart. "Do we tell the others what really happened—that we fooled them into thinking the proposal was real when it wasn't, but then realized we were only fooling ourselves—or do we let them go on believing the lie?"

Edward hummed as he considered Bella's words, the sound causing a rumbling vibration in his chest that both soothed and excited her.

"I say we make our confession at the wedding reception. Perfect speech material, right there."

Though her eyes were closed, she could hear the smile on his face.

"Honestly though," he continued, "I don't think it makes a difference whether we tell them or not. Ask yourself this: _was_ it a lie? Did we really fool them _or_ ourselves? Every word I said during that proposal was honest and true. I was just as ready to move forward with you then as I am now. We may have decided after the fact that it had been 'real' for us, but I think our hearts—our _souls_ —weren't fooled for a second."

"Hmm. That's a very good point," Bella mused. "You know, it's sort of funny how this whole adventure started with deception and mixed-up personalities, but in the end, the joke's on all of us. I guess fate can have a sense of humor sometimes."

"Oh, so you're saying you believe in fate, Miss Swan?" Edward teased. "I never would've guessed."

Her shoulders lifted in a shrug. "I haven't made up my mind one way or another about things like that. Fate as an explanation works was well as any others I've heard." Bella pushed off his chest to sit up and flash him a coy smile. "But I'll tell you one thing I believe in, _Doctor_ Cullen _._ I believe in _us_."

He answered with a roguish grin of his own. "Is that so?"

"It is." With a sudden burst of energy spurred on, in part, by his sly expression, she hopped off the couch and tugged on his hand. "Come on."

"Oh? And just where are we going?"

"To the bedroom, of course. We have a very _real_ engagement to celebrate."

Edward smiled at the answer he'd known was coming and allowed himself to be led down the hall.

"Yes, yes we do."

o-O-o-O-o

* * *

 **The End! Really and truly this time, lol.**

 **Thanks to Powered By 23 Kicks for her help with some tricky spots (and for always being there for me). Big hugs to everyone who read, reviewed, and followed along on this one-shot-gone-wild journey! Love you all!**


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